A
female
age
36-40,
*layDoh
writes:I started going out with my boyfriend at christmas, all was going great, we only get to see eachother at weekends because he lives a fair distance away n works all week. last week however he seemed a bit distant and off when texting me i thought nothing of it but told him that i thought that n he said he was sorry he has been a bit down, i asked why but he said it was nothing. on the saturday he was supposed to be coming down to see me, i phoned him to see what time and he said he would be heading this way shortly. thats the last i heard and i couldnt get hold of him at all! i got a text next day saying that he was really sorry and that he doesnt want to hurt me, i asked what was wrong but he wouldnt tell me. he finally told me that there is problems at home and that his ex turned up wanting to talk! i asked if this was changing anything between us and he said he doesnt know, i dont know whether i should wait and not give up that he will sort himself out or to leave him and let him get on with it! he wont talk to me properly and its really hurting me! what should i do???
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female
reader, elsie +, writes (15 March 2007):
 How horrible for you and how bloody convenient for him. He cant even give you the time to explain himself. I think that reeks of guilt. The fact he said he doesn't want to hurt you by explaining the situation obviously means that you definitely won't like what you hear.Why should you wait until he sorts himself? He can't sort out having a decent conversation with you. If you can be strong finish the relationship and you can come out of it with some dignity and pride. You will show him that he may not have any respect for you but you still have some respect for yourself.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 March 2007): Well, sorry to say this, but if that was me i would tell him to buggar off. He didn't keep you informed, spent time talking to his ex, now he doesn't seem to know what he wants. Take the equation away from him. You point out that you don't like to be dangled on a string or looked on as second best and if that is how he is going to go on in the future then the relationship is over. If he really wants to be with you he will jump to his feet. If he doesn't then you are well rid. There are plenty more nice blokes out there who you so deserve.
Take care
xx
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