A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Dear Cupid,I am recently remarried to a man who treats me good. The problem is, is his ex wife. She constantly causes trouble in our household. She even shows up and waltzes on the property like she owns the place. She sends her daughter up here on weekends to "spy" on me because the daughter goes home and tells her mom stuff and then the phone begins to ring. I have nothing to do with this child because I get reprimanded everytime she visits. I even had to call the post office to put a stop to the ex and the ex mother in law's mail from being delivered to my address. If I say anything to my husband, he defends her. I have to either lock myself into a room for the duration of the visit or I get into the car and leave the house during these visits. She has invaded everything including my page on the internet. I was reprimanded for something that she called him at work and told him that I had on my page and it wasn't there...I had to pull my page up and prove her alligations were false. I don't like living like this way but I DO love him. She and her mother call here for stupid things...like wanting MY husband to go to their house and fix things..he tells them no.He has even lost his cool with them on the phone and it was not pretty.The clincher is...he only goes to pick his kid up when the ex is home because SHE wants it that way. She even tried to get him to take his kid on OUR honeymoon...HE was irrate about it and the kid DID NOT GO! She even tells MY mother all kinds of things about us and MY mother doesn't like it or her for that matter. Everything would be fine if she would just keep her nose out of my business and mind her own. HOW can I make her stop??
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Adey  +, writes (10 November 2008):
Simple - do not engage. Leave this up to you husband. These lies only work because you react. No matter how maddening they are just smile and do not enter into a discussion. Ask your husband what he wants you to do and agree an approach - an stick to it. Don't let yourself be caught in the middle. That's their game and you can stop it from working. When its not working people get bored very quickly.
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