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female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: My husband has not had contact with his daughter for 16years, she came into our lives 2years ago and has completly distroyed our relationship, it's like he's having an affair he's obsessed!! and whatever she say's goes and he can't see what it's doing to our children being pushed aside. she is 18 and lives with her mother(who is single)and he stays there overnight every weekend. The mother too all of a sudden is more understanding and the best friend he's had (he forgets why they split) and now he has finished with me? after 16y ears of marriage i'm numb, angry, lost; any answers?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 July 2007): Sorry about your situation, but you are not alone. It's no wonder why the divorce rate is so high in families with step-children. My boyfriends daughter who just showed up in our lives after her mother ran off with her 9 years ago is weighing very heavily on our relationship. We were just starting to get our relationship in check when she popped up. Now, our two little girls are second best and she walks around like the princess that she thinks she is. Daddy doesn't see a problem with the special treatment that he gives her and thinks I'm being a B when I call him on it. She treats him like one of her teenage buddies and lays all over him like he's her boyfriend, but he don't see it. The girl is 15 has been pregnant 3 times, drinks,steals and conducts herself like she is 21, she's the same size as me and he allows her to lay all over him like she's five years old. So, believe me I feel your pain. He doesn't spend the night at his ex's house, but who knows what is next. Everyday is something new. I'm sorry for your pain, but you're not alone. Be strong and work at making it better. My personal solution is moving on and starting over new without him or her in my life.
A
female
reader, brainache  +, writes (19 July 2007):
"THANKYOU" for your replies,it's good to know there are people out there to listen and help,it means alot to me.
My kids are 19 n 16,and are just the best,
update:He has now left the "home" after he announced he is moving to same place as them!!!! i've had enough B.S***.
and he certainly gave us tons over weekend,so i told him to go there an then with no options,I think we've heard enough,
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A
female
reader, LauraE +, writes (11 July 2007):
I bet you are angry; these last couple of years must have been awful for you. It is understandable that he wanted to make friends with his daughter again, and like you say, he has forgotten why he split with his first wife. There must have been a reason, but he is living in his past at the moment and won’t want to think about awkward questions like that. I suppose he might come back after the novelty has worn off. Question is, do you want to wait around on the off-chance while he is off playing at happy families? It might be a long time or never. If you accept that he is gone, you can make a start at rebuilding your life. I know, this sounds ridiculous at the moment, but if he has gone for good you will have to do it. If he changes his mind after all, you should then be in a better position to decide whether it’s worth risking having him back, because you will feel stronger than you do now. You can’t undo the hurt he has done to your children, just continue to be a great mum to them, and look after yourself as well.
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A
female
reader, love-him +, writes (11 July 2007):
 Hi babe, he has been overtaken by himself, he has found his daughter who he had not seen for 16 years and has now found his old lover. The fact that he has left you, and stay at his ex's house, seems to me, that you are a lot better off without him, How old are your children? He is walking out on your children doing the same he did on his other daughter.. I hope i helped, Mail me if you want to talk x x
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A
female
reader, love-him +, writes (11 July 2007):
Hi babe, he has been overtaken by himself, he has found his daughter who he had not seen for 16 years and has now found his old lover. The fact that he has left you, and stay at his ex's house, seems to me, that you are a lot better off without him, How old are your children? He is walking out on your children doing the same he did on his other daughter.. I hope i helped, Mail me if you want to talk x x
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