A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: I am a 38 year old woman who was in a long distance relationship with a wonderful man. He is handsome, charming, smart, fun, kind, and everything else that a man should be. I have never met a man like him in my entire life. The problem was that he lives 4-6 hours away. That was all fine until yesterday, now he says that he can't continue this because of the distance and that maybe it was a mistake that we both made seeing someone that lived so far away. When I met him I wasn't looking to get into a relationship with anyone (I don't want to deal with heart-break) but he was everything I could wish for in a man and we had so much in common, so I took that chance. I really liked him but now it is over because his car broke and he said it is impossible to continue this. I would rather spend an hour a day talking to him than spend time with a other man that lives closer. However this is not possible and I need to move on now as he is. How do I do this when all I want to do is cry. I miss talking to him. We never even had a fight. I can't really say that I miss seeing him as we only dated for a little over 4 months and only saw each other once a month. I miss knowing he cares. There are many other guys that I could date but they do not compare to him. Maybe I was a fool for starting to fall for him. He never told me that he really cared for me but I felt like he did because of how he acted toward me. The most he ever told me was that I made him feel special and that I was alot of fun to be with. I really wish it didn't hurt like this but it does. Any ideas on how to heal my heart quickly?
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female
reader, Cateyes +, writes (4 November 2007):
I guess it really depends on how serious the relationship was/is. Was he just mad because the car broke down...which can be repaired, maybe it was just frustration that came out? I also think, if he was serious and really wanted to be with you, it wouldn't matter about the drive and, if he was/is in love with you, he would then talk to you about other alternatives, like possible marriage if it was really becoming serious. In my eyes, if a man really loves someone and he wants you to be in his life, nothing would stop him to be with you. It's that love, your communication with them, time well spent together, feeling of trust, it's what you get from that one special person that you don't want it to stop and there is just something about it that you don't want it to go away. You most definately could have let your guard down and now, it hurts because his feelings were not the same as your's...and believe me, I know how that can feel...it's a pain unlike any other because you fell in love with him...the man who was wonderful to you. I wish there was a "magic" pill that could take pain away quickly, but unfortunately there is not. Stay busy with things you enjoy, and maybe again, you will meet someone unexpectidly, because I am a believer that is where real love begins....when you least expect it.
Chin up and keep your smile everyday. It's hard, but you can do it. It will be his loss, not your's. We can't make people love us or do certain things, but one day they will realize and unfortunately, it's always too late.
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