A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Ok, so my boyfriend and I split last month. He went to another state and I stayed right where I am. I was heartbroken, devastated, felt alone---I thought this was the man I was going to marry. Now everything has been thrown away and I felt left in the dust. He didn't seem to care and moved on like we didn't even have a 2.5 year relationship. Recently he has been calling, emailing, etc. He makes references to when I will go see him and talks like we are still a couple (minus "I love you").I would seriously move to be with him but I don't know how to bring this up. He was so firm that he didn't want me to go and now he gives me the indication that he wants to see me again. I'm going home in a few weeks and he lives about 3 hours away from me. I want to see him but at the same time, I don't want to get hurt AGAIN by him saying he doesn't want to be with me. What do I do? Let it go? Ask him again? I feel everytime I bring it up I push him farther away and I don't want to do that.....Please help!!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2008): You need to be brave.
You've asked before, but he was sure the relationship was over. But now he seems to indicate that he has deep feelings for you.
You need to tell him how much this is hurting you, you need to ask him if he wants a relationship with you or not. You need to find out how he feels and make sure that there is no chance of you and him getting back together.
If he dosen't want you, then you will need to accept this. Cut all contact and have nothing further to do with him. It is dangerous to your mental health and well being to stay in this nowhere place. Find out if he wants you, and if he dosen't finnish this relationship and move on with your life and look for happiness alone or with somebody else.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2008): For you to be able to move on with your life, you will have to resolve the issues with this guy.
When you are going home, maybe meet with him, have a heart to chat and take things from there.
Then you will know what to do and if need be, move on!
This is not going to be easy, but if you don't clear this matter, it will haunt you for a very long time, you will always wonder.
Be strong and find your solution!
Best of luck!
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