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male
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anonymous
writes: now I'm really really peeved. i've given enough time a week, and I've only seen my boyfriend once,since he's been here for the birth of his nephew, and he lives far away that I rarely see him! but he has time for everyone else but when it comes to me, hes too busy, having dinner with family and friends. what is the ranking of a partner? near the top or dead last. I'm feeling angry and stupid like i dont matter.I'm feeling used like a fuck buddy. and he tells me he loves me but when i want to see him again hes too busy and things are hectic with all his family and they dont know when the baby is due, any moment.What do i do.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2006): Call him up and sound like you are out of breath from being so excited. Sound all excited and stutter a little bit (adds to the believability) Tell him you just won 'X' amount of money in the lottery. Make sure you pick an amount that isn't too high or especiallly low. At least one hundred thousand dollars. Talk fast and slightly hard to understand. (again adds to believability) At this point he'll be thinking of that new sports car he'd love to own. He may want to see the 'winning ticket'. You of course sent it in already to the state lottery commision. He will be visiting you real soon. REAL SOON. Make sure you have pictures of high prices items cut out of magazines left laying around for him to see. (again the believability thing) Call travel agents in his presents to inquire on tours abroad and cruises...etc...When you're sick of him hanging around waiting for the $$$$---go buy a matchbox car that resembles his dream machine and wrap it in a dollar bill. Tell him he better go because he needs to spent time with his family. That'll fix him!! Write me with the outcome...PLEASE [email address blocked]
A
female
reader, jellybean +, writes (27 April 2006):
Did you see the Oprah where they we doing the "HE's JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU" don't waste your time.. get on with your life and let him get on with his.. i'm sorry if that hurt your feelings but you probably knew that anyway!! GOOD LUCK!!
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A
female
reader, Aunt Audrey  +, writes (23 April 2006):
 Have you posted this question before? I seem to remember something similar, anyway.....
Its understandable you are feeling hurt and rejected, you don't seem to be too high on his list of prioroties at the moment. Living away from home I would imagine your b/f is catching up with family and friends, and unfortunatly he doesn't seem comfortable in having you present at these gatherings, although I don't see why you cannot go out with him when he's meeting friends.
I would start to see the friends you see normally when he's not around and be less available when he calls, no point sitting around waiting for him.
You are feeling used and this is understandable, but the ball is in your court, you don't have to sleep with him, nor do you have to drop everything when he calls, speak to him and make it clear you have a life too, that doesn't revolve around him 24/7. Of course he needs to spend time with his family, this is an exciting time for them all, what with the new addition to it on the way, but sorry there is no excuse for ignoring so much.
Why wait on the sidelines all the time, it's just hurting and upsetting you, you can't make him want to spend time with you, and if he'd prefer to be with his family and friends all the time, seeing you fleetingly, then you should start to ask yourself what your getting from the relationship? Hurt by the look of it!
Good luck!
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A
female
reader, Jadzia1127  +, writes (22 April 2006):
 When dating your priorities should be family, partner, friends. After the next step and your partner is family then it goes immediate family (partner then kids) then extended family then friends.
It is not wise to make a dating partner pick you over family. It is not wise to be in a relationship that, have friends picked over you. If you haven't talked to him about how you feel then do so. Let him know you understand the importance of family but it hurts to be ignored and left out.
If you have already talk to him, then what your seeing is a precursor to what lays in store if this relationship continues. You will be last on his list of priorities.
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