A
female
 ,
*una~
writes:My boyfriend never seem like he's on top of things. I always see him as not knowing how to prepare things ahead of time. Maybe I'm a bit on the organize side. But I like the idea of knowing what to do next. On the other hand, my boyfriend is a really serious and thinks alot inside his head kind of guy. He thinks things through probably more than I do. However, he shows he'll deal with issue with it comes up. Is all guys like this? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Yuna~ +, writes (12 January 2007):
Yuna~ is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thanks guys! The thing about how you tend to find someone who completes you is something I never realized. Thinking back to why I love my boyfriend, it is because he is someone who has his own character yet shares same values as me. He is a caring and responsible fellow. He just weigh the importance of the problem before solving it, whereas I worry about everything all at the same time.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 January 2007): No this is not just a guy thing. This is just a people thing. I know a lot of males who are very organized and need to plan ahead. I know, I have one. I tend to be the more spontaneous one. So yes, there are a lot of couples who are opposites like you and your bf. In fact, many of us tend to choose partners who tend to challenge us, and compliment our own personalities. Rather than copy us. It makes for balance in a good relationship. You both will learn from each other, your own strengths over time. It can be a positive thing. Just keep accepting his ways..he is who he is and you love him. There is a down side of course, to be aware of though. People with opposite personalities need to be respectful and they must reach compromises a lot with the key words being communication and negotiation. This is important in all relationships regardless of personalities. It makes for a stronger relationship. How you both learn to handle your differences will over time set the tone for your relationship and should you both ever marry or have a future together..it will always be a long term process, that you need to be aware of. I wouldn't worry about it..you love for who he is and full acceptance and respect is important, as like all relationships. Good luck hun.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 January 2007): We all are different, which is a good thing. Sometimes i am laid back and sometimes i get stressed over the daftest things. It's a good job we aren't all the same. You will have to decide whether you can live with this, if not then move on, life is too short. I think in time you will get to find a happy medium.
Take care
xx
...............................
A
female
reader, Jovial  +, writes (12 January 2007):
 Hi there
this is the result of different personalities and there is nothing wrong with that. you are more like me, I love budgeting, doing things correctly, make sure if there is enough food for the whole moth, activities for the week are planned ahead, if we are entertaining I want to make sure there wil be enough everything and the guest must enjoy themselves and trust me I do all this things by myself, my partner doesn’t get involved it bores me and I have accepted that, he will just say tell me how much you need or if u need advice ask me, he will ask me the progress but getting fully involved is not his style, if u let him organize anything i.e barbecue: he will go and buy meat as they roast until someone saves the day; funny enough he is an attorney and you will wonder how he prepares for his cases while he is so disorganized and the thing is law is his career and the household issues are something different. the truth is his way and my way of doing things are different and it makes me happy, because i know when to depend on him and when he can depend on me thats why we are a couple.
strange enough I never dated a man who liked organizing staff and it made me realise that people are not the same and although we might be inlove with each other it doesn’t mean we have the same personality, thats why it is important to find someone who compliment your pcharacter not who complete it because that is when the problem begins. find joy in what you do as long as he is aware of what is going on and shows interest in someway other than planning I say its alright. Just make sure you always communicate ask for his input so that he doesn’t feel like he doesn’t matter in the rship. If u want to share some future plans why don’t u find out things he loves, things he hopes to achieve and share on that? It will enrich the intimacy level of communication and sharing.
Good luck
jovial
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 January 2007): Just like girls, boys are all different and unique. Don't ascribe things about him to this whole 'Men are from Mars' trash - there are plenty of airy, disorganized girls around, too. Either grow to love this about him, learn to tolerate it, or find another boy who is more together. I promise you there are plenty.
...............................
|
