A
female
age
30-35,
*haraoh
writes:Hello everyone, i seriously need help and everyones opinion on this great or small because it's all i think about. I have loved this boy for 3 years, i have never said anything to make him aware of this but in year 10 we drunkenly slept together...i know this was wrong, stupid and it took me awhile to relise things won't instantly return back as they were, when we where close good friends. It's been about a year now, since it happened in august 2008. Things have definatly progressed we joke and laugh not nearly as much as before but it's moved on from the awkward no eye-contact times. During this time of severe awkwardness i did stop eating at times, the longest period was a full week... it gave me something to focus on and i relise this is/was wrong but he has slept with so many more people since we did and it hurts me so much even though i lie to a lot of my friends and say i hate him. Anyway i don't know if anyone is familiar with the facebook honesty boxes (you write an honest message to someone anonmusly and they recieve it, then are able to reply and so on) Recently i got this messge say 'Was (hisname) good?... im jealous' i relpied 's'awkward' because obviously i wasn't going to talk about that with a stranger... they replied 'do you think your hard... f*****g b***h' i don't know if it was him but it sounds exactly like the kind of thing he would do, when drunk. I recived another commenting on my profile picture with me, another boy and another girl he slept with in it said ' nice picture...hahahahaha, of both of you...hahahahahahaah' i replied 'i don't get it' ( but i do get it) since he is the one whos slept with me and the other girl im guessing only he would comment like that, still i don't know... but since these messages he doesn't say hello he just looks at me and then away agian. This hurts so much and i feel im wasting my time with someone who couldn't care less about me... but i just can't forget him it's impossible he is nice to me just when i convince myself i hate him and i fall back in love (i obviously don't completely hate him ever, i know) but when i think im moving with him nicely he becomes unfriendly and cold, nothing like before. I want to be his friend cause i can't imagine not being around him. Please share your thoughts and opinions. x
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, softballplaya  +, writes (12 June 2009):
 hello,
I understand what your going through is hard. But sometimes, no matter how bad you want to keep someone in your life you have to keep in mind of what you deserve and how this person will affect your life. Obviously this guy hasn't made a positive change for you..so why keep him involved? Its hard when you care about someone and they don't seem to have any concern for you at all. i've been in that situation time after time. My dad was the one who told me "surround yourself with people who bring positive change to your life" at first I let it go through one ear and out the other, but then it sunk in that he was right. Its a tough thing to get over someone, but your making yourself miserable by dwelling on him. You should never ever starve yourself! any caring and decent person wouldnt put you through something to even make you want to do this. I think you shouldn't waste your time trying to gain the respect and care from a person who is too ignorant to provide it to you. I'm not saying boyfriend wise, but even friend wise he doesn't seem worth it. Surround yourself with positive people who will bring positive change to your life. I hope I helped you:)
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