A
female
age
30-35,
*L11
writes:hello, im 17 years old, and i've been with my boyfriend for 2 years, hes recently been in the army for 4 months, we miss each other like mad and plan to spend the rest of lifes together, its all planned out, and i know that sounds silly cuming from two 17 year olds, but there's a problem, he will be posted to cyprus soon and i have to go with him, there's no doubt about it, i need tips and advice and what to do and how to go about it? a plan more or less.thanku :) Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (16 December 2008):
I'm sorry sweetie but I think I've given you all the help I can.
If it gets to the point where you can't cope any more then you may need to end the relationship as it's not very good for your mental health.
He'll be home for Christmas surely?
Good Luck!! xx
A
female
reader, GL11 +, writes (15 December 2008):
GL11 is verified as being by the original poster of the question can someone please help me because iv been stressed and cryin 4 the past 8 munfs naw its not gettin any better, its getting worse, and i just want to be ..
please wb ny1..
x
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (27 September 2008):
Sweetie, with everything you've said I really think you are just going to have to accept that yours is going to a long distance relationship for a while.If this relationship is for real and you really are planning to be in love with him for the rest of your life, then long distance will work. You'll get through it.It will be horrible but you will be able to do it.Sometimes you can't always be together, and if you are going to be an army wife or girlfriend then you are going to have to get used to him being away for Most of the time.Your best bet for continuing your career and having support to cope for when he goes on tour is staying at home. I'm sorry but I think you're just going to have to wait till you are 18 and then you can plan and save money and move abroad when you know all your options.At the moment you just seem to be clutching at straws and jumping into things that probably aren't going to make you happy long term.Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, GL11 +, writes (26 September 2008):
GL11 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionyea dats true, id b worse off.. thanku, n im havin problems me n mi bf keep arguin bcz the fact that my mum wont let me go 2 cyprus with him til im 18 and thats not till next year, so we're finking about sittin our parents down and talking about marrige, but i just no there going to say no and that im talking stupid, but this is what i want, and to carry on with my modeling will be hard but i can do that in cyprus right?.. wb thanku xx :)
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (26 September 2008):
If you join up then you will definitely be separated, for years at a time. The army chooses where you go to. You don't get a choice in the matter. Plus you'll be miserable if you aren't joining the army for yourself.
Imagine 6 months in Afghanistan getting shot at and mortared when all you wanted to do was be with your boyfriend. He'll probably be in Iraq doing the same thing so you'd be even more worried and stressed.
Unless you are joining for yourself as a single girl looking for a career then don't do it.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, GL11 +, writes (25 September 2008):
GL11 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionim thinking about joining the army, will i be able to do, i need lots of information about it and what sort of direction i can go in, please rely back thank you x
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A
female
reader, GL11 +, writes (10 September 2008):
GL11 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionyea, so i could rent from someone, and mi boyfriend would pay hehe, but i was thinking about gettin a job outside, so it gives me something to do, like working at a restarunt or bar or something, and just get the bus.. maybe.. lol mi boyfriend will be doin a 9 to 5 job so will have the evenings so i wont really be alone, but when he does have to go to athganistan, thats when im coming home because i cant stay out there bymiself, i dont really want to do that, but then i will have no job, so it is difficuilt not sure what to do or how to plan..
nyway thankyou :) x
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (9 September 2008):
That's good point. If you don't want to get married straight away then you could find someone to rent a room from.
I'm sure there are other private soldiers who are married and could have a spare room. It might be a bit awkward if you were living with his corporal / sergeant / boss.
There are always jobs within the army base, like working in the Naffi bar or shop, or working in the welfare office, or the cook house, or even the nursery or english school.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, GL11 +, writes (9 September 2008):
GL11 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionoo ritee, well, im definalty not having kids yet lol, but mi bf will no people dat are married who will also be posted 2 cyprus and i could rent from them maybe? this is what he thinks, but what sort of jobs could i do out there, because i should imagine that its not very busy during its winter time.. hehe
:) xx
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (9 September 2008):
I think you need parental permission to get married under 18, but that shouldn't be a problem.
When he gets deployed you can always come home and move back in with your parents so you are not alone.
I would just say to be very very careful before you decide to have kids. The army is a hard life for both of you and I don't want to have a kid while there is a risk of becoming a widdow.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, GL11 +, writes (9 September 2008):
GL11 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthankyou so much you have really helped me, can i marry him at 17, everone would think im stupid, because im so young, but this is what i really want, more then anything, im useless at finding thinkgs out on the internet, and searching for stuff, but i am goin on holiday to cyprus so i can look around and find a job ans stuff so thats good, but thats the best advice i've has, marry him, we was goin to do it when we're 18 but why not now..? we want to be together forever, so it does make sense... thankyou x :) your a really good agony aunt
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A
female
reader, GL11 +, writes (9 September 2008):
GL11 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthankyou so much you have really helped me, can i marry him at 17, everone would think im stupid, because im so young, but this is what i really want, more then anything, im useless at finding thinkgs out on the internet, and searching for stuff, but i am goin on holiday to cyprus so i can look around and find a job ans stuff so thats good, but thats the best advice i've has, marry him, we was goin to do it when we're 18 but why not now..? we want to be together forever, so it does make sense... thankyou x :) your a really good agony aunt
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (1 September 2008):
Marry him. Get a civil partnership and the army will pay for you to move out there and give you a house.
Either that of you need to go out on holiday and start job hunting. The army is banned from one or two resorts due to bars getting smashed up etc but I am sure you will be able to find a place near his base.
Please bear in mind that being an army girlfriend is really hard if you don't have any friends around you. He'll be away a LOT and you'll be stuck on base alone in a foreign country.
Trust me, I'm an army wife and I get so bored I could cry sometimes.
Good Luck!! xx
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