A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My hubby keeps it all the way 100 with me - very open and tells me everything. I feel lucky but now I'm beginning to feel like I'm not comfortable with his openness as it is not making me feel good.How can a man be this open with his spouse and yet I have a problem? It's not the openness I have a problem with but the revelation that my hubby tolerates bullshit in his marriage. He shares everything with me. Deep down i am boiling thinking to myself why is he telling me this like it's OK? He thinks its OK to still keep woman friends and I don't. I doubt if some know he's married. I have completely let go of all my male friends. If they still text me they show me respect. If i see anyone trying to come on to me disrespectfully I know what to do.My hubby on the other hand thinks there's nothing wrong as long as he doesn't sleep with them.I see myself constantly trying to correct him. Btw I trust him that he won't cheat, but should I watch as other women threaten my home for the sake of not hurting my husband's feelings?For example he told me a girl from the past asked his buddy for his phone number and she called him. They chatted for a long time. But this is a crush of yours back in the day, why entertain the phone call when you are married? Or am i tripping? Most especially because he told me this.So should i just accept that this is who he is and trust him. Surrounded by many women who wants him. Should i just value his being open and take that over secrets. I'm sure there's a way to coexist with a man who all ladies want. What advice can you give a woman like me who seems to be secure but yet my constant correcting and checking is making me come across as insecure.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 December 2015): This screams out as a man on a huge ego trip. He sounds like a self absorbed idiot. And that's me being honest!!
A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (14 December 2015):
 He doesn't just think it's okay. He feels the pride sharing this information and making you feel insecure. I agree his contact with women is disrespectful to this marriage. I don't appreciate his honesty either. Here you have a man who constantly needs to prop himself up by making women like him. He's the one who is insecure and wants to bring you down to his level.
He would not physically cheat but with his mind. He may be having fantasies about them, masturbating to the thoughts of them and even think of them while having sex with you. Cheating has many levels. You should keep your high standards and should not have accepted your husband that he's the way he is. You are giving him too much credit by being honest.
Honesty is one foundation of a healthy relationship but his kind of honesty is blatant, in your face, and vain. No more correcting and checking. You decide what your boundary is and he has to respect it.
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