A
female
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anonymous
writes:My husband and I have been together for 5 years. A typical week night at home goes something like this; I come home from work, he's surfing the web. I exercise, cook dinner for us while he's still on the web. We eat dinner and watch TV. Usually he surfs the web while we watch TV. If we're not watching anything interesting I might play a game, after I've gotten the dishes done. Suddenly my husband says I'm not paying enough attention to him, that I'm always "wrapped up in my computer"...Huh? I usually reserve the right surf only if he's already doing so. Anytime he wants sex, I'm always willing; never too tired or busy or disinterested. If he wants to talk, I turn off my laptop and talk/listen. Yet when he's surfing or watching something on TV, I can't say a word to him without getting my head bit off because I'm "breaking his concentration". So I usually just find something to do that's quiet. Now suddenly it's my fault that he's feeling neglected? Am I missing something here? It seems like he's very argumentative lately even when I go out of my way to do nice things for him, or cook his favorite things. Anytime he needs my help I'm always there. And when we do go out for dinner he always seems to complain about the food, or the waitress or the prices. I just feel like I'm walking on a land mine. Any suggestions? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (5 October 2011):
 I have a similar problem. I've taken to ASKING "so is there anything you would like from me now?" and then telling him... "I'm available should you need me"
sometimes this helps... sometimes not. we also skype and email even when in the same location as needed.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2011): I think he seems to be addicted to the internet.My own marriage ended because I was addicted to the internet (this was 9yrs ago).I have a normal life now. Have worked, exercise regular, have a normal relationship.My son though, was also addicted to the internet, it was rather disturbing to have to get up in the early hours to tell him to get off the net and he got aggressive with me! He is grown up and has left home now with someone he met on the net (another addict).I tell you what I would do lol - I would cut off the supply without him knowing. Cut a cable or unplug something without him knowing. When neither of you can surf the net - talk to each other and find out what is going on and what you both want out of your lives.That is my opinion anyway - the internet is a dangerous place and breaks up marriages. There should be a law on how much leisure time one spends on the internet lol. Health warning - overdosing on the internet is bad for your marriage.Good luck x
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2011): He wants out of the relationship. Men push their partners away with these behaviours when they no longer feel they want to be with them. Communication is key, he needs to talk to you as a grown adult about what he is feeling.
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