A
female
,
anonymous
writes: hey well me and my bf have been together 4 months. Everything going great apart from ive noticed how different he is when we have sex. I mean when we have sex sober he is really quiet and ejaculates really quickly but when we have sex drunk he is really noisy during sex and lasts longer. Im worried why he is like this? I prefer having drunk sex with him because obviously it lasts longer but also because he is so much more passionate with moaning and saying my name and stuff. When hes sober hes so quiet and subdued that I dont know when hes come. I think he knows its bothering me because he avoids sober sex with me now, and I think he feels silly cos he cant last long. I try to talk to him about it but he changes the subject. Hes quite a self conscious guy when sober. How can I get him to open up more? And the way that hes been, does that mean he only likes having sex when drunk? We are both 22.
View related questions:
drunk, ejaculate Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2011): I've dating someone like that before and it's really depressing because you can't trust that the person is really emotionally or sexually attached to you.
I suppose men drink for sex for the same reason women drink to have sex; to feel less inhibited and erase insecurity issues they might have. What does it mean? It means he might not feel close to you, but most likely it means he feels insecure about himself and he believe he can only please you when he's drunk. If you only hit him up for sex when he's trashed, you might be reinforcing the belief that he's inadequate when he's sober.
You've talk a lot about his preferences and what he does, but what about your preferences?
Do you ever initiate sex? Do you ever express what you like verbally? If you did, I think it might go a long way in letting him feel at ease when he's sober.
Good luck.
|