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age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: im 16 and my bf is 21. we`ve been dating for 3 months. every time we have sex he likes to do it rough and cause me pain. he says its "kinky". he will choke me and bite me and pull my hard and smack me and bite my lips so hard that theyll bleed. lately he has become obsessed with choking me to the point of blacking out. im starting to fear my life during sex and often tell him no now, he has only taken it once when i told him no at first but then didnt try to fight back after he started doing it. i feel as tho i need to leave him or get him some mental help but im scared that i will break his heart. i know this sounds crazy, but please help. thank u.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 January 2010): What if, the next time you two had sex, and he did this choking-until-I-black-out thing, he accidentally murdered you? You'd be dead, and he'd be tried and sent to prison and--depending on which state you live in, possibly facing the death penalty.
Is that what he wants? I'd ask him that question. And a good idea would be to stop having sex with him until you're sure he won't do this to you ever again. If he laughs in response to your question, or if he says it can't ever happen, dump him quick, since he's demonstrated that he doesn't respect you (or your life) enough.
Take care, girl! There are plenty more guys out there who don't act weird in bed.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 January 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks everyone. i guess i need to talk to him about it & if he will not stop then obviously he doesnt love me. vv hes never wanted to cut me i dont think... ive never asked him... but no he never has intentionally cut me.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 January 2010): is this the same bf who is wanting to cut you and make you bleed?
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (10 January 2010):
Forget his heart. What about you? I thought I'd do a bit of research into American domestic abuse figures for you, and these are real. On average, 3 women a day are murdered in he US by an abusive partner, and 1 in four women at some point will suffer domestic abuse. Worse still most won't do anything about it. A sobering thought, I hope you would agree. He's hurting you, he's making you bleed. Don't become another number on a list somewhere. Get away from him.
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A
male
reader, RAINORFIRE  +, writes (10 January 2010):
 you need to talk to him about it hes abusing you, dont worry about hurting him hes a man he should be able to handle the truth if he cant then you dont need to be with him your the one that is getting hurt
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 January 2010): Anything goes in the bedroom, with ONE rule, that you are both happy with what is happening. Which your not.
I think you need to leave him, before he really hurts you, or by the sound of it chokes you.
Find someone that loves and cares for you.
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