A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:There is a guy who I have in a couple of my classes that asked me out but I had said no. We still talk so theres no problem there. Recently though Ive seen him with another girl (hand around her waist, etc), and since then he's been more touchy with me. Like he'll get too close to me glancing over my notes, our elbows will touch and he won't move his arm, things like that. What explains this behavior? Now, before he had a girlfriend I would innocently flirt with him, but knowing he is with someone now flirting on my part has stopped but it seems like he's taken up the flirting with me.
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female
reader, Maria-consuela  +, writes (21 October 2010):
 Perhaps you are now the forbidden fruit. Before he knew he could have you, perhaps if he put the effort in, and now he knows it probably wont happen. The 'flirting' may just be him trying to prove to himself that he still feels macho or attractive, and it may just be casual and not based in any other motive.
Either way, more importantly if it makes you feel uncomfortable let him know. The fact that you are asking this question in the manner than you are suggests to me that maybe you have an underlying interest in this man, or perhaps you wanted him to continue to pursue you cause it was an ego boost. If either of these statements are true, then it is understandable. These are common feelings. If you have no romantic interest in him, then the ball is in your court. Be clear and articulate with him, and he will get the point. You may think that he can read into your signals - you no longer flirting - but it is quite possible that he is oblivious and unable to read them. Lay down the law if need be.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionIts just that its sort of a sudden change. He wasnt like that before. *I* used to be the one who tried to get close to him, now its the other way around.
If his actions mean hes more comfortable around me, then I'm guessing its because since he has a girlfriend now he doesnt feel antimidated/pressured around me :p
I would like to hear other opinions as well.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (21 October 2010):
 These simple things he is doing could just mean that he is comfortable around you it doesnt nessisarily mean that he is flirting with you. If he does try anything on though just explain to him that you dont want anything to happen and he has a girlfriend so his behaviour is really wrong.
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