A
female
age
30-35,
*ance4
writes:My ex dumped me 3 days ago... And i can not stop thinking about it. I didnt think there was anything wrong this time. He has dumped me three times previously... Each time he distances his self from me. Deletes me from facebook. Stops texting me. Then comes back when he can not find anyone else. But i'm tired of heart ache and this time i am done. He dumped me through a text message. The one thing i asked him never to do. He was my first boyfriend. And treated me really good. And made me feel things ive never felt. I am 18. And he is 22 in the navy. He will only be here for another year. He dumped me the first time because i was a virgin. And i am saving myself. He dumped me this time because he "we have nothing in common. I dont eat around him. I'm always upset but i hid it from him". I explained opposites attracted. He gave me this cant eat cant sleep feeling. So i couldnt really eat around him. And he paid for everything i didnt want him wasting money. he said i was too sensitive so i hid it how i felt all the time. i feel so unwanted. Which isnt me. How do i get over this... Ive been working out until i am sore too keep my mind off of it.
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female
reader, bunnyblueeyes  +, writes (15 August 2011):
 YOU need to distance yourself from HIM.
Change your number, block him from your facebook and most importantly, DON'T have him back.
There are some great guys out there and you could do so much better.
Cut him out of your life and move on. He is Not the guy for you!
Good luck.
A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (13 August 2011):
 The truth is, when he broke up with you because you're saving yourself until marriage, that should have been the end of it. He's wanting sex, and you're not that kind of a girl.
You've got to let him go. He's not the guy for you, and he knows it, but you're still going after him no matter what. You have to come to grips with the fact that for all of us, sometimes relationships are a miss. We feel this feeling when we're passed over for a job, or a promotion, or a relationship. Everyone experiences it.
This isn't even really about him now. It's about you. Life has just pulled back its fist and socked you in the face. You've hit the ground. Do you stay on the ground and cry and are sure that you will never be wanted again, and that your very essence has cracked because some guy made a decision that had more to do with him than you anyhow?
Or do you pick yourself off the ground, dust yourself off, wipe off the tears, straighten your shoulders and fight back? You must not be allowed to let anyone's rejection or decision stop you from being who you are. Face it -- he was incompatible with who you are. This doesn't speak ill against you. Do you get really upset when you try on a pair of shoes and they don't fit right? Of course not! You put them back and try on another pair!
Are men a bit more complicated than shoes? Of course. There's a lot more emotion and life investment when it comes to relationships. But if you break it all down, this Navy guy wasn't a good fit for you, and you weren't for him. By letting him go, you're allowing yourself the opportunity to find a guy who's a much better fit for you. The fact that you had a "can't eat can't sleep" thing just underscores that he wasn't right for you.
Working out is very healthy, and I commend you for it. It's not self-destructive like drugs, alcohol, or food binges. You aren't unwanted. You are loved in life. He just didn't fit, and you can release your grip on that fact mentally so you can find peace.
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