A
female
age
,
*ustmauvy
writes:I met a man on an online dating site just under two weeks ago, he is 56, I am 50, he is stationed in Afghanistan and his tour will be over on Dec 15th. He was married for 18 years and divorced for 7, I was married for 15 years and divorced for 3.My problem is he already claims to be in love with me, he says I'm the answer to his prayers, that we will spend the rest of our lives together and that God has brought us together etc, etc.Since we've never met, I'm finding this behavior a little hard to take and I'm questioning his sanity. I've tried telling him to slow down on several occasions, but it does no good, should I just stop chatting with him or consider him just a really aggressive individual?
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (4 November 2012):
 It might be a scam
he may just be loney
he may just be an excitement junkie.
IF you are having fun then proceed very slowly with GREAT caution.
If it's stressing you out... walk away... and block his info so he can't contact you.
UNDER no circumstances are you to send him money.
A
male
reader, CJH  +, writes (3 November 2012):
 He's infatuated with you that's all.
If you think you may be interested in him, wait it out - that is, let him get over these initial feelings. The more you tell him to slow down, the more he will proclaim his love so stop that now.
What you should consider here is how you feel and what you want. Right now it's clear this bloke isn't presenting you with his true self. He may be telling you what he thinks you want to hear or he may be exactly as I've said above, infatuated.
Either way, you sound like a level headed, intelligent woman. So, hold off on meeting him, carry on getting to know him and enjoy the flattery for now. If he's still coming across so intensely say a month or two down the line THEN might be the time to say thanks but no thanks.
You never know with people you meet online. Its such an impersonal medium that it's often easy to mistake intentions and actions.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (3 November 2012):
 Just under 2 weeks and he declared he LOVES you? Yea, major RED flag.
I understand that he can be on a lot of pressure being deployed and living a (pardon me for being blunt) fantasy "love-life" with you might be his way of coping.
Honestly I would be VERY wary. I would also wait til get cats back to the States to make a decisions. However I think you need to trust your gut.
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A
female
reader, Sugarbuns  +, writes (3 November 2012):
 Yikes! Run!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2012): Yes, he is coming on way too strong. Someone who develops a quick emotional attachment is a big red flag. Be careful.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2012): OH MY GOD.... Honestly sweety. From the bottom of my heart I would google 409 eater forum and get into the love scam section. This is the typical behavior of the Nigerian love scam! THey use things like being stationed overseas and then they come on VERY strong, then they tell you they love you and want to marry you. Then he will ask you for MONEY saying he needs it to get back or to buy something over there. It sounds like a scammer, and even if you hear his voice and he sounds American, a lot of them have that accent just to fool you.
You really think a normal sane person would do this jsut after two weeks???? NO!!!! It sounds like scam all over.
THey take pictures of real soldiers and pretend they are them.
Take his picture and reverse look it up here: http://tineye.com/ and on here http://images.google.com/imghp?hl=en and you can see the other sites where they are used or where they originate.
Scammers use dating sites and prowl on women your age. This is from personal experience PLEASE take my advice seriously!!!! Please do not send money or goods!!!!
This is the forum if DearCupid permits :
http://forum.419eater.com/forum/viewforum.php?f=44&sid=991080f56aeae018aaf825c783eadf18
More articles on this topic :
FROM THE US ARMY: http://www.cid.army.mil/romance_scam.html
http://www.dailyfinance.com/2011/11/11/scammers-not-soldiers-internet-romance-cons-get-a-military-twi/
http://www.datingnmore.com/fraud/scam_database.htm
http://www.scamwarners.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=52112
Sorry for the link DearCupid they are very important. Please don't fall for this scammer!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2012): Run for the hills and don't look back. It all sounds a little strange!
Good luck!
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A
female
reader, shrodingerscat +, writes (3 November 2012):
 He's coming on too strong! Men like that often throw meaningless words around like "love" when they're really only trying to bed you. Since you already talked to him and he hasn't gotten it, you need to stop talking to him period. He doesn't respect your boundaries, which means if you do get into a relationship with him, you'll see more of the same behavior.
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