A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm 17 and my boyfriend and I'd been going out for over a year now. Things are going so well.Lately, we have been fighting. We broke up a couple of times and we end up being together.Then as time went on we felt like new. We we're happy.Then one time... I broke up with him, I apologized and I wanted to get back together. See he is this loyal nice guy. He asked for space cause he got scared that I might break up again it just kills him. I gave him that space. Then we got back together. While he was having his space and time he had new friends. I saw him texting his classmates sweetly. Then he told me there's nothing to be jealous about. I let it go.Then we were okay. We chatted at night. He told me that he was going to sleep so I'd sleep too. There's a glitch on Facebook where you can see while he's typing and who he's talking to. Then I saw... That he was invisible to me. And he was chatting with his crush. And his friend. He kept telling his friend that he's falling for her. My heart was crushed and I called him. I told him to stay away from the girl. He promised to. And he was sorry.A week after, I opened his account again. And I saw their messages. I was like "THEY'RE BESTFRIENDS NOW?"I kind of thought "what happened to the distance you promised?" He said "I dont like her anymore. She's just special and I dont want to end our friendship." I kind of understood him. But the trust was destroyed.Now I keep getting paranoid whenever I see them chatting. EVERYDAY. But my boyfriend loves me and he shows that. He also showed that he did avoid the girl. But then at times I get so insecure.What do I do to trust him?I love him so much. I don't want to lose this.I appreciate for the ones who read this and will answer. God Bless :)
View related questions:
broke up, crush, facebook, get back together, got back together, insecure, jealous, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (5 May 2011):
 Who is doing all the breaking up? Do you keep dumping him and then expecting him to come back, and feel the same?
I think you probably do have a reason to be concerned about the new girl, I think she is his friend. But you see, the way you have been treating him isn't particularly nice. You are trying to control him, control his friends, even though you have demontrated a couple of times that you are prepared to dump him. You've even started invading his privacy by logging into his facebook account.
There's a saying that says, if you love someone, set them free. If it was meant to be, they will come back to you.
You are trying to control him and his emotions. This is a losing proposition that will backfire on you, eventually, he will start to resent you and if he finds out you are reading his private messages, well, that's the end of his trust in you, isn't it?
Stop stalking his interactions, try to be a good girlfriend to him, acknowledge that by breaking up with him you have hurt him and see what happens. Let it go and soon enough you will see how he responds. It may be that he will move on from you or it could be that he will draw closer to you. The point is to let him decide for himself, rather than dictate to him, okay?
Good luck.
|
