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female
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anonymous
writes: I have been in a relationship for 4years, my boyfriend moved into his own property March this year. initially the plan was for me to move in after 6 months to allow hima chance to be independant. This apparent need for independance has not occurred as i'm there 4 nights a week. I feel as though he has the best of both worlds a girlfriend whose there all the time without the stress that comes with living with someone. He hadnt yet mentioned the precise moving in date so i asked and he has now decided that he wants to extend this moving in date till early next year. I am upset, he said its not because he doesnt want to live with me or that he doesnt love me, just that he wants to ensure he doesnt regret never having spent enough time living alone. There is no room for compromise. Am i wrong to be upset, hurt and angry by this? and he has also stated that when we do eventually live together i am expected to sign a form of contract to ensure i dont take him for everyhthing he has, does this seem fair,and am i wrong again for disagreeing with this?
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female
reader, shania  +, writes (20 July 2006):
 If you were in this relationship for 5 mins then yes it would of being too soon to move in...but you have been with this guy for 4 years...i would say that was long enough,it does seem like he is getting cold feet and is not too keen on you moving in with him.Sounds like he isn't too sure about you.Commitment phobic springs to mind.Tell him that you wont beg him to change his mind but you want to take the next step and live together,otherwise you will go your seperate way.When he realises that he could lose you it might give him a big wake up call but if he just shrugs his shoulders then you will know your answer.
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