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He's been discussing our sex life with his friends and co-workers! Do I confront him?

Tagged as: Dating, Sex, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (19 January 2015) 5 Answers - (Newest, 19 January 2015)
A female United Kingdom age 26-29, anonymous writes:

I just found out that the guy I'm seeing has been telling everybody about our sex lives. I understand him telling his friends, but he has told his work colleagues as well. This makes me uncomfortable as he is my first sexual partner and it was a big step for me. Apparently he told one of them that i was begging for it. I find it a bit disrespectful, hes made me sound desperate, which i assure you wasn't the case. Should i confront him about it, or just leave it, i don't know whether this is typical for men to do as I've never been in a relationship before.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (19 January 2015):

He's an idiot and it will make itself blatantly obvious in due course. In the mean time, weigh how happy you are vs how much his immaturity winds you up. If the balance is still tipping towards happy then sure, stay with him. But be aware of the fact that you two are not going to last the distance - and that's a good thing for you.

So in short, stay with him if you're happy for now but DO NoT compromise your future for him. Don't make too many sacrifices. It's not going to last.

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A female reader, mystiquek United States +, writes (19 January 2015):

mystiquek agony auntAw..I'm sorry hun. I haven't been that age for a long time, but I don't think his behavior is the norm. Most guys, at least the decent ones don't kiss and tell. This one sounds like he's trying to boost himself up and be "big man on campus". Totally immature and disrespectful. Either talk to him about it or dump him. I'd go with dumping him.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (19 January 2015):

He's a legend in his own mind. Discussing details of your sex-life is not only locker-room mentality, but it's adolescent and obnoxious.

I don't know how you discovered who he was telling; but this should be a good reason to tell him take a hike. He doesn't respect you, and over-sharing things in order to boost his image indirectly demeans your reputation. Best to kick this one to the curb. He's a tool.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (19 January 2015):

Honeypie agony auntThis is not typical. I don't know how much of this is "locker room" mentality, but to me it show GREAT immaturity and disrespect (for you).

My question is this, HOW did you find out he was saying these things?

I think HE was bragging NOT to make YOU seem desperate but to make HIMSELF seem like he is the "king of sex".

And yea, I would have a word or two about HOW he talk about you.

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A female reader, celtic_tiger United Kingdom +, writes (19 January 2015):

celtic_tiger agony auntThis is not typical and he sounds like he is very disrespectful of you - not good qualities in a boyfriend.

Sadly I fear he may just have been using you, and now is gloating about his conquests.

Just out of interest, how old is he? This sounds like something a teenage boy would do, bragging about how much of a man he was. A decent man would respect the woman he was in a relationship with.

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