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female
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anonymous
writes: I kinda have this problem with a lad that i know. See iv grown up with him for pretty much my whole life. My cousin and him are real good mates, and my sister sort of too. I, for my age, and mates with him too, but not on a high level. More of aqcuantinces. But see my sister and cousins are the same age so they get along great. And my cousin is mates with "Ryan", thus my sister is too. Now whenever they invite us somewhere, like the cinemas or what not, i feel like Im just a tag-along. I mean "Ryan" talks to me and even jokes around with me. I dont know if he really is friendly with me or is just doing it to be nice. Though lately Iv started to realize that I kinda fancy him, so now im stuck. My aunt recently told me that (since we were the same height but 6 yrs apart) wed go good together. I suppose she wasnt serious, obviously. But since then I cant look at him without my eyes darting. And when we had this new years eve party I tried to look good in front of him, and unfortunatly he can really read me because I think hes suddenly become tense around me and figured out that i fancy him. I mean im sure we could make it work..just not at this age. But i would wait. and i wouldnt make it obvious either. Though apparently I have. All of sudden everyone seems to think we'd go great together. How can they sense this? And i wonder if theyre just joking..."Ryan" is absolutely perfect for me. he likes the same music, which is very rare--I mean where can you find an Aqualung, James Blunt and Coldplay lover who isnt gay? (no offense) He and I have a really great sense of humor, and really caring too. AND he asked for directions when he was lost...only the perfect lad would do that! and even I, at 15 can get along with him like Im his age. Since I liked him though, Iv felt awkward around him. I dont know if what I want is reasonable, I dont want to become lovers, obviously...just better mates which might HAPPEN to evolve. I understand that he isnt going to be best mates with me and be calling me to hang out. But is it weird for a 21 year old to be friends with a 15 year old? And how do I act around him to make it seem like I dont truly fancy him?? Thanks a bunch!
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female
reader, happytochat  +, writes (4 January 2006):
The people who around you and Ryan, sense that you two are good together because you most probably are! Its just a thing with great couples, you can tell that they just 'go together' by just looking at them. Its a a feeling, a sense, there is no signs that actually give it away. Its like a gut instinct that people have about you and him.
No its not weird for a 15 year old girl to be mates with a 21 year old guy. Firstly, guys mature at a much slower rate there girls, so thats why often in relationships the male is older, as older guys often suit younger girls due to the rate of maturity emotionalyl and mentally.
How do you act around him without giving it away that you truly fancy him? I say just be who you are, take a deep breath and relax and don't over think things, by thinking about what ot do/say and how to act, just be casual, although I know thats hard when you are crazy about a guy! But don't try to cover it up, if anything he will be flattered. You can be really friendly and all that jazz, without giving the signal that you like him more thne a firend.
In the end though, I think its best ot always tell someone how you feel. He seems like a great guy who probably does like you, yet if for some crazy reason he doesnt, he seems mature and nice enough to handle it well wil class! so its not like he will reject you in a harsh manner.
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