A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I'm 23, my girlfriend's 25, and her dad hates me for no reason. He just insists he hates me.My girlfriend's mum thinks I'm great and says I'd make a great son-in-law and has teased me about how I look like a young Pauly Shore!I don't know why her dad hates me, I have a good job, I treat my girlfriend well, I haven't got a dodgy background, I'm healthy and sane.I think he feels inferior to me because he works at a Subway sandwich shop (my girlfriend told me that).When he's not working (which is Friday to Sunday) he just sits around in his underwear boozing and smoking and this embarrasses my girlfriend.I think I should, with my girlfriend's help, try and get him to have some more self-confidence.What should I do? Me and my girlfriend are both worried about him.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2009): If I were you I would step back from this problem and let your girlfriend deal with it. I think he feels jealous / threatened by you - your girlfriend has a new man in her life and he is less able to assert his opinion on her etc. My slight problem is that I know from my own experience with my now mother in law that they never change their attitude - my mother in law has not liked me since I was 15 years old and being 37 now it has caused terrible heartache. Your girlfriend needs to deal with this - you are not a martyr so I would not waste energy trying to change him or help him change.
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