A
male
age
36-40,
*cVities
writes:Currently in a relationship for over a year now with my girlfriend, who's 17 and I'm 20. For the whole year we've always been in touch and haven't gone a day without talking to each other. However for the last couple of months, shes been acting kind of weird. Recently shes been telling me not to phone her, as she'll phone me whenever she wants to talk not when i want to. I see who only twice during the week, and thats at the weekends so talking on the phone is the only sort of contact we have. She's still at school while I'm working all week, so she hasn't got a job, which leaves me paying for everything for example; taxi's, cinemas, nights out and anything she sees in the shops.The sex in the relationship used to be good, but ever since these last couple of months she hasn't wanted to do anything, and now she doesn't want to do it at all, in her own words "We're not having sex anymore". Fair enough i don't really mind, but its beginning to feel as if I'm being used or someone else has entered into this relationship who I'm unaware of, as she's cheated on an ex before. A little help would go a long way, cheers. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, chlez83  +, writes (15 January 2008):
Well before you start suspecting your woman of cheating you need to know one thing.Women usually come into a relationship with more excitement,energy and expectation but over time feelings begin to change and automatically expectations about the relationship also change.In short,most women go through a change.The spark is gone,the sex is now boring and they are looking for something new.If they'll stick to you is entirely up to them coz you can't force them.All you need to do is be yourself and expect them to make the right decision.
As for your gf,it seems more weird than what i described above.You really need to get to the root of the problem and discover what's causing her to behave like that.Don't make the mistake of direct confrontation.99% of women who cheat will deny when confronted aggressively.You need to coil with her.Treat her nicely.Be romantic and finally ask.If you are really nice you'll get the right answers.
Good luck.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2008): you sound lieka great and caring guy, especially as you look after her and treat her and dont expect sex, only to talk to her. you are on the right lines welldone. however, it seems she is acting quite immaturely in that she is being very selfsih about the relationship and is getting more out of it than you are. I think you are being used, maybe not consciously, but she is doing it and you sound like you deserve better.
tell her how you feel about being used, give her a chance to improve, and if she does not i think you should end it, or at least until she is prepared to grow up a little
gd luck sweetheart
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