A
female
age
30-35,
*unter_jumper
writes:Ok, so im a 14 year old freshman in high school, my ex boyfriend, who is 17 and a junior, and with whom I went out for a little over 2 months. He thought our relationship was great but it wasnt all i ever did was bend over backwards to keep him happy. So we broke up. Its been 2 and half weeks and he follows me from class to class, and talks about me and is threating the guy he thinks im dating. Last week when i told him I was sure i didnt want to get back together, he punshed a wall and missed me. im scared of him, but he has told his friends he is doing it so he will get me back. I feel like im putting myself in danger, as well as my friends. He is planning something.. i know because the dork wrote on someone's facebook wall about it.. im worried and scared. can someone help? please?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2009): Hi, I believe I can help you with your problem. I'm a 16 year old girl and in high school as well. I know one thing and that is boys. I've been in many relationships - good and bad ones. This also means I've been through good and bad break ups too.Something I should tell you is this: FIRST, ignore him. There is nothing to be scared of. If he is really into you, he will not hurt you or your friends. You need to block him on your Facebook and on MSN and everything else that he can contact you with. This might seem silly, but his behavior might become aggressive. Which may in turn get out of control. I've been there.People hate being ignored. It's one of the worst things or the biggest. It may make him depressed, but really, it's not your problem. He is 17 and he will get over it eventually. You can try to hook him up with someone you know or someone you think would make a good girlfriend for him to help him get you out of his mind.Talk to him at school or face to face, whatever, just don't do it on MSN or Facebook or emails. Tell him he needs to stop and if you want to be friends, then you guys can be that too, but nothing else. He needs to be confronted directly.Tell him he is scaring you.(Mod Note: your entire message was re-typed because of your major lack of punctuation, atrocious spelling mistakes and grammar. It was approved after the editing because you're giving pretty sound advice. Please use sufficient English next time before you post. Thank you.)
A
female
reader, bubbloo24  +, writes (12 March 2009):
 I'm glad it's being dealt with appropriately.
Take care and best of luck.
x x x x x
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A
female
reader, hunter_jumper +, writes (12 March 2009):
hunter_jumper is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks to everyone who helped.......We had to involve the police.....and he might have charges brought agianst him...we aren't sure what they are but it is over finally.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 February 2009): Hi Hunter_Jumper,If you don't feel safe, inform your parents and if you cannot talk to them, inform your class-mentor or even director at school. You could do the following:Tell him that he will know deep in his heart what everybody is knowing that : nobody can enforce a relation, a friendship nor love.Tell him that he scared you and that you have informed that at that people, because you were so much shocked by his behavior (eventually that you did not recognize the person anymore with who you were in love with once).Show that you are more mature than him.I think that you should tell him that your love is definitive over for him and that you only can respect him if he is respecting you and your friends and you new love-life(don't go into details).Tell him that we are all young and make sometimes mistakes, but with violence he will always have the wrong affect and that you hope that he learned this from from what happened.Don't use too many words, tell him and point. Try to stay cool/calm and use words like ...you will/should understand...Hope that my answer helped you a bit.Keep us posted.
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A
female
reader, bubbloo24 +, writes (8 February 2009):
I seriously disagree with the anonymous person on here. Do not talk to him, it'll add fuel to his fire.
As pvtguy has suggested, you need to talk to your parents about this and conclude what the next best step is. I think it would be that you should speak to a person of authority at the school. The liklihood is that after doing this and after someone has spoken to him about it, he will be embarressed and shook up by it and therefore will realise that he must stop it.
The fact that he attempted to punch you when you tried to talk to him automatically tells you that you alone cannot do anything more, he won't take heed to what you are saying.
You need to get someone in higher autority to talk to him and do it now before things get really bad.
I hope that this helps, please, do not try to talk to him anymore in a crowd or DEFINTILY not on your own.
Take care xx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 February 2009): What is he planning? What are you scared of? How is he threatening your new boyfriend? For goodness sake, you need to tell your teachers and your parents NOW, and by the sounds of it, the police. This behaviour is unnacceptable. He needs to be stopped for his own sake, and yours. Please let us know that you have.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 February 2009): Talk to him, but make sure its in a crowded environment. Tell him that you think he should find himself someone better than you (not true, but you need to play with his mind here), tell him you weren't enough to keep him happy and it was hurting you (again not true but again mindgame). Tell him that he was such a good bf but that you two weren't perfect for each other, and that you understand that its hard for him to see you dating and that you can hold off on it for now (maybe u should not show it in front of him, your safety is at stake), but that he should look into dating also. That your still too much of a child and immature (not true but yeah), and he needs someone better than that.
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