Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, hurt-again  +, writes (16 August 2008):
hurt-again is verified as being by the original poster of the questionok thank you all very much
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2008): I suggest you do your 21 year old son a big favour in life and do ensure that he does not think or expect that from his girlfriends or future wife; do help him on the right path; he might have the wrong idea of what men "can" and what women allow;
Do start thinking about youreslf first and I hope you will find the happiness you DESERVE; somebody that will spoil you; value you and appreciate you;
BUT stop "nursing" everybody around you and take care of YOURSELF; you DESERVE the best.
Keep SMILING
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A
female
reader, hurt-again +, writes (16 August 2008):
hurt-again is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you you are right i have two children aged 18 and 21 and they treat me the same way all though my 18 year old daughter is not nearly as bad as my 21 year old son who still lives at home
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2008): Thanks for the feedback; I suggest you realize what you are doing wrong regarding relationships; this one and previous; STOP doing it; Start taking care of you and your needs and stop being to GOOD and to GIVING.
Get some professional help if need be: to help you overcome these problems; by trying to be to good and doing to much you are "nursing" these guys; like mommies babies; they sense that; and they take advantage!
End your current relationship and start thinking about yourself; but do change your "pattern" and your way of behaving; let the guys do the "hard" work; allow them to be the HUNTERS; and always leave a little mistery; they must know that you are not DESPERATE to keep them around;
Best wishes and lots of SMILES
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A
female
reader, hurt-again +, writes (16 August 2008):
hurt-again is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you for your comment i dont think its that i attract this sort because when we first meet its great they ghange after a while i think its because i give everything to the relationship and they can see how hard i work at it to make it work and they use this against me they think i will always take it and they will always have me to run back to but even i can only take so much
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2008): This is a destructive relationship; you need to end it; it seems as if you are so use to people hurting you and abusing you that somehow you are attracting this kind of behaviour and you tolerate it;
PLEASE do get professional help;
You DESERVE so much better in life; cut all ties with this guy; MOVE ON
BUT do get help; you need to learn to love yourself; build up your own self esteem and free yourself from the unresolved issues of the past;
I know it is noteasy dealing with deep issues, but you will have to do it; that is they only way forward;
You need healing to be able to MOVE ON;
You have my empathy and my thoughts are with you;
Best wishes and keep SMILING.
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A
female
reader, hurt-again +, writes (16 August 2008):
hurt-again is verified as being by the original poster of the questionoh my, well i guess i better tell all i have supported him through everything. His father died i sorted everything out; he has been violent towards me then crys hes sorry its his fathers death and yes it has affected him but his father has been gone a year he has been like this for 8 years. He has never hit me just pushing and breaking things. He strangled me once he knows im scared of him as he has admitted this to his family i do everything for him. As for me picking on him no im to scared to say how i feel in case he kicks off or leaves. I have been sexualy abused at the age of 10 i married when i was 16 he beat me i remarried at 28 he hit me and gambled bad now this guy is doing this to me i dont no anymore i give up i promise you its the truth.
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A
female
reader, hurt-again +, writes (16 August 2008):
hurt-again is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you for answering my question well up until last year he used to always go to his fathers he has since past away he now has started to run to his mummy thing is he got inherantence of 100,000 and spent most of it on the house and me he has no money left and then leaves i dont get it
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A
female
reader, hurt-again +, writes (16 August 2008):
hurt-again is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you for answering my question well up until last year he used to always go to his fathers he has since past away he now has started to run to his mummy thing is he got inherantence of 100,000 and spent most of it on the house and me he has no money left and then leaves i dont get it
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A
male
reader, kenny + ♥, writes (16 August 2008):
 I think this guy is acting like a spoilt child, chucking his things out of the pram and the first argument, then running away for a considerable amount of time. You say he does not have many friends, and does not go out on his own, so where does he go for a few week's on end?. I think that you can do so much better that this guy, he is basically using using you as a doormat, sodding off for a couple of weeks, who knows where then coming back when he feels like it, im sorry to say it but he is seriously using you. I think that you need to take an imediate stand and ditch this guy, next time ge goes away you should pack all his things up, change the locks and oust him out of your life. I feel if you don't take a harsh stand then he is just going to be doing this for ever and ever.
I wish you all the best, mail me if you want to further talk about this.
Take care x
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A
female
reader, hurt-again +, writes (16 August 2008):
hurt-again is verified as being by the original poster of the questionoh i also forgot to say i have never been told that he has actualy cheated so i cant say whats going on in his head
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