A
female
age
41-50,
*eciram
writes:dear cupid,i met a guy in 1997 named vladi when i was working in a factory,that time we both married,our relationship was on and off because we are trying to correct our faults of being married already until i am totally seperated with my husband. The communication with that guy really have no closure coz we used to get met once in a while, we both know why even we havent see each other for 2 or 3 yrs ,our feeling to each other still the same, and now if i count the years were running for 12 years ,until i confessed on him that he was the faher of my last child which is 9 year old now.at first i was in denial that he was the father of my youngest even he really felt it that it was his child becoz of the siyuation that i was in my ex-husband before.My life was so bitter with my ex-husband becoz he so irresponsible,and i was really abused by him thats y i really fall inlove with vladi until now the feeling was the same.For now being seperated i am freely go wih him sometimes when he is out of town and everytime we were together we both happy. He so happy and love me for i was so being understanding on his situation coz i dont bother him whenever he was with his family.He loves our daughter and always do apologize becoz he cant lend his whole time for my daughter. I know that i was doing wrong but what can i do if i really love him and if know in my heart that he is my eternal love.I am 33 yrs of age,,there are some admire me but i cannot teach my heart to switch to other. I am willing to be like this bcoz of him and bcoz we had a child, but sometimes it really comes to me the time that i feel pity fo myself that am just waiting for his call to see me and my daughter. I know eople judged me that i am a sinner but they cant judge the feelings that i have. He told me he cannot leave his wife bcoz of their children,i feel the insecurity that am just a second choice,and i feel it was unffair. AM ASKING FOR HELP TO MANAGE THE SITUATION.,,,thank you
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female
reader, Another_Kapiti  +, writes (15 November 2009):
 OK, firstly you aren't a 'sinner'...technically you did cheat on your husband (obviously you don't love your husband) for a man whom you do love, and who says he loves you...I'd be careful here, as you say you are willing to leave your husband, but he doesn't want to leave his wife (because of the children he claims) I'd probably suggest that you divorce your husband (for the sake of yourself and your children) and just claim time for yourself. You could wait for years for the man you love to leave his family..are you really willing to do that? Wait for years?
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