A
female
age
30-35,
*ola_montez93
writes:I think I might be gay/bi...HELP!?I'm a 20 year old female and I am so confused it's driving me nuts! I can't seem to enjoy sex with a man at ALL, I've been having sex for 4 years now and haven't had an orgasm once with a man. I can do it myself with the help of toys. On the other hand, I do find myself attracted to women. I've never done anything with a woman so I guess I do not know if I am gay or bi. I am attracted to men though too, ahhhh! I am just so confused and don't know what to think. Any other bisexuals out there think they can relate and give me advice?? Thanks!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (18 February 2014):
 just because you don't have an orgasm during sex with a guy does not make you gay or bisexual.
MOST women do not orgasm from straight intercourse. (less than 30%) It would be like asking a man to orgasm from having his scrotum stroked. It's just not going to happen.
I am bisexual but I am happily married to a man and I have forsaken all others for him. This includes my "girl play" time. I can look at a woman or a man and think "nice tush" or whatever.... both turn me on.
If you are confused as to your orientation then date some girls too.. BUT if your criteria is that your man can't bring you to orgasm that's not an accurate measure of your sexuality. Only his poor skills as a lover.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2014): Oh and one more thing. A lot of men at this age aren't good at sex. They might just not be doing it right. Don't let that influence you.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2014): Don't let the orgasm thing be a deciding factor. I'm quite straight and it took my boyfriend (now husband) four years to get me to orgasm and it was with the help of a toy. Its been another year and a half since then and I can't manage it with any kind of consistency. A few questions. Are you attracted to men because you find them attractive? Want them sexually? Or because it is what's expected? Or you've just never questioned it?How exactly are you attracted to women? You can find a woman attractive without sexually wanting them. Is it sexually? Imagine the act is that something you want? Or is it that you find them attractive? do you want Them? Or want to Be them?Think about these questions and you should get your answer.
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