A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My problem is very long, I apologise in advance. Basicaly I'm stuck between 2 guys.Guy A I met about a year and a half ago, when I was 14 (and so was he). After a while, about the end of august, we decided to go out. As most couples are at 14, things were a little awkward but we got along fine. After a while though, things did not seem to be working out, and I was considering dumping him, but something made me hold on and I kept trying. Unfortunatly he didnt see things the same way and dumped me first, although he tried to get me back the same day, but obviously I declined! We stayed in contact, and kept talking and texting in a friendly manner. After a while he asked me out again. I said no again, I still had feelings for him but I said no, as I was scared it would all mess up again. So time went by and we continued to chat and (almost exactly a year ago) we started going out again.Now, Guy B I met a few months after Guy A. He is my dads friends son, so our family went for dinner. I found him attractive, but nothing more. Around the time I started going out with Guy A again, I recieved a facebook add from Guy B, and a few months later, a msn add, and so we started talking.Meanwhile me and Guy A are all happy. However through a misunderstanding and people getting involved when they shouldnt have (I dont want to go into that too much, its a different story) I was led to believe that Guy A was hating our relationship but just didnt want to let go (this was all rumors by jealous girls) so I made it easy for him. I dumped him. About 3 days later one of my friends decided she fancied Guy A. Obviously I was not over him, but I thought she should go for it. I knew Guy A had always had a slight interest in her. Anyway there was a whole situation where the Guy A and this girl were being pushed together by interfering people, and it upset me, although I hid it. I mean I had no real reason to be upset surely? After all I dumped him. The whole thing was a mess and after a day out with all my friends with contant attempts to get the two together, they all left for home, except me and Guy A. And he kissed me. And I didnt stop it. Afterward I just felt so guilty and selfish. It was a awful thing for me to do to my friend, and so I talked to Guy A. I told him how we were over and not to do that again it wasnt right and to go date the other girl. After that he didnt go out with the girl, insisting he didnt like her. I kept my distance, but after while we began talking again, more and more, untill every night we would be on the phone (It drives our parents wild!) I spent time and got to know his family, and went on trips away with them (I even met both sets of grandparents). Likewise he did we me, my family love him. I realised just how little I knew him for the last 6 months. Now we were just bestfriends. He was always there for me to have a chat and we spent all summer with each other. Although we were so close, he always made sure I knew that he was interessted, and confessed he was in love with me. Now for the readers, I know this seems as if he was just spending time with me so he could get be back, but believe me hes not like that. Take it from me he is one of the genuinly nicest people I have every met, and sadly I dont meet many. I wasnt sure whether to keep in contact this much with him, as I didnt want to lead him on, but all the times I stopped talking with him he would call me and if im honest, spending time with him was one of the one things that kept me going (I realy dont get along with girls, and I go to a all girls school). Anyway for my birthday, he baked me a cake, and got me some realy sweet thoughtful presents, one of them being a hand drawn picture of my dog (hes awsome at art, and knows I love my dog to pieces). I was very touched.By now me and Guy B had met up a few times, not as in a date or anything, just for family stuff and got along pretty well. We were talking lots and I enjoyed his company, and he was dropping pretty heavy hints he liked me.Anyway me and Guy A are best friends. For Xmas he got me a digital photo frame with all my favorite pictures in it! Hes actually adorable. Except he keeps trying to get me to go out with him. Guy A knows about Guy B, and how we talk a lot, and pretty much hates him. Guy B surprised me at Xmas and got me a gift (perfume) whereas I never thought we were on present giving terms (dont worry I got him something too in the nick of time).I think I have feelings for Guy B, and I know he has them for me. But there is no way on this earth I would hurt Guy A, because hes my best friend. And I know that doing anything with Guy B would hurt him, a lot. I dont want to lose either of them, and I know I would rather have both as friends than Guy B as a bf and lose A. I have told Guy A many times that we are best friends, and when he says he wants to be more than friends, I tell him thats stupid, look at how close we are, what can be 'more than' us??I dont know what to do.. I thought maybe I could have a talk with Guy A, I mean the poor guy is living under false hope. I have told him countless times that I dont want to go out, 'see each other' or anything else, but he wont accept it! I could never tell him that I like Guy B... he would be so upset. But Its been a year and a half. Ive been getting on with my life, be of course I cant tell him about the other guys I've met. Do I just go out with him? Or the other guy? Or neither and upset all 3 of us? Im so confused! I try not to be a bad person but I dont want to lead Guy A on, and I feel that I have been leading Guy B on (Although I am interessted in him) but then it would be bad if I turned him down... I feel like such a cow. Any advice? And Happy New Year everyone... hope 2009 is less confusing! x
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male
reader, nikandme  +, writes (31 December 2008):
 Well here is what it will turn out to be ether way. one of the is going to get hert.But if you do have any feelings for guy A it would probly be a the btter thing to o out with him. he is a better friend, and more in you'r life. you risk losing the person thats more in you'r life Vs. a guy who is kinda in you're life. In my oppinion, this is where so many peoplego wrong. Because they dont know what they had till they are gone......I almost promise you if you start going out with guy B Guy A will be gone and you will miss him and want him back. The same thing will happen if you chose guy A and B leaves. but you would not be losing the biger part of you're life. This all is just my oppinion. you DO NOT have to do it. but his to me would bethe right choice.If you need aything else. message me.
A
male
reader, roadman +, writes (31 December 2008):
 Tell the both of them you love them,and which ever one leaves then you'll be left with one!
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