A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey. I am 17 years old. Recently, I have been with a very close friend of mine, whom I have known since pretty much the beginning of high school. She is one of my best friends, we hang out all the time, and we basically talk about everything with each other, it's just always been that way. Recently, she told me she liked me a lot and has a lot of strong feelings for me. However, many times when we try to engage in sexual activities, I can't "get it up." This is wierd because I never have any problem masturbating, or anything like that, and I know for a fact that I'm not a homosexual. I really love this girl, she is way more than just a friend to me. we have been through so much over the years, and she knows that I really care about her. It just is really frustrating to me that I can't always please her the way that I want to and she wants me to. It's wierd, cause, we've had some casual sex, and done other stuff, but a lot of the time it just doesn't work, and when it does, it takes a while. But when I masturbate, I don't have any problem... I know it's really wierd, but I need advice or else I will never solve this problem. We have always had a very strange "friends with benefits" thing, but have always remained extremely close friends for years, but something always felt so right about this girl, I know it, but I don't want to lose that to this. HELP!!
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male
reader, chlez83  +, writes (15 January 2008):
Nervousness,anxiety,relaxation.Ya,if you put it that way but hey if your manhood doesn't wana work don't force it.You need to work on your emotional attachment first.Maybe it knows that what you are doing isn't so right! lol. Don't be freaked out if you know that you are normal and aren't homo.When you are choking da chicken it does get hard then even with her,it'll surely get hard.Give it time and don't think about sex too much,you put alot of pressure on your hormones and anatomy.
Take care.
A
female
reader, shandygirl +, writes (15 January 2008):
 I agree with Laura1318... STOP masturbating! Save all you sexual urges for her.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (15 January 2008):
 You could be nervous, stressed, and concerned about your performance. Just relax and enjoy. Another possible reason may be you are over masturbating . Cut down or do not masturbate to keep your sexual tension high.
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A
female
reader, desirewhitefire  +, writes (15 January 2008):
 Just take a deep breath and RELAX. You're getting yourself so worked up about disappointing her, you can't preform. Stop thinking negatively, and the next time you two get intimate, go into the situation knowing that you can do it and you're going to be great at it. It may be a combination of performance anxiety and self consciousness. If she didn't enjoy having sex with you, she wouldn't still be hanging around waiting for it. She obviously likes you and likes the sex, so just calm down and take it easy. Go nice and slow, have lots of foreplay beforehand, let her tease you, etc. I can almost guarantee that you will get so excited, you'll just want to pounce on her. Hope everything works out.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 January 2008): You're possibly just nervous for some reason. Perhaps you're worried about getting her pregnant, or that you will not do well. Once this has occurred one time, you may be afraid that it will happen again and again, which could certainly keep you from getting up. I only had this happen once, believe it or not, because I licked her breast and got a mouthful of strong perfume. It took my mind off the moment. Maybe you're not having enough foreplay. Ask her to stroke you and imagine your masturbating. Or ask if she will stimulate you orally. That may certainly get you stimulated.
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A
male
reader, shikari424  +, writes (15 January 2008):
Well if it's usually in working order, and doesn't go up when around her, it's clearly just nerves.
Make sure there's no pressure on you, and let things just happen when you're doing stuff with her. And they probably will ;)
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A
female
reader, xapathyxrebornx +, writes (14 January 2008):
 Hun maybe you're nervous at some stage at thats what stopping you from 'getting it up' are maybe it could be something else like low ciculatary system hun. I suggest you go to a doctor if the problem carries on.
message me if you need anymore advice
x
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