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anonymous
writes: Hi I have never used these agony aunt pages before but I have a really bad problem. Well to start off I am a 14 year old boy and I think im in love with this girl I know. I don't know what I should do or say. It's like every time I see her it's like I want to ask her out but I'm afraid of the answer.See, we went out before for about a week and she dumped me and that almost left me in a nervous breakdown. We are now good friends but I still have feelings for her. I don't know what to do. When I do see her I'm head over heels in love but when I leave school ,I just want to crawl up into a ball and die.See I don't know if she likes me now. She cuddles me sometimes and we have good conversations but I don't know what I should do or say. I have liked this girl for about a couple of months now and I just can't get thoughts of her out of my head. I like her so bad I just want to cry. I know I sound weak but I don't know what else to do. I just want to stop loving her or better yet if she likes me my problem would be over but I dont know that now, do I?. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 April 2005): Dear Head Over Heels, First of all,I just want to let you know that you are SOOO not alone.I am a thirteen-year-old girl and was in the same situation. If you really feel this strongly about her,I think you should tell her.Don't be all straightforward or anything because you don't want to scare her,but just drop little hints that you like her.Leave anonymous notes in her locker and see if she metions them.If she says good things about them,tell her to meet you somewhere to find out who you are.Best wishes,Sarah
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 April 2005): Considering that you have such stong feelings for this girl, you should give it another chance. You never know, she might regret that she broke up with you in the first place! You say that you two have good conversations, so during one of those conversations, simiply tell her you need to ask her a serious question and you want a serious answer, but say it in a sweet voice not in a commanding voice. Tell her how you feel in detail, but not enough to freak her out. If you are as close with her as you say you are, then she will give you a straight out answer. Just take a deep breath and be yourself. Say what comes to your mind and be natural. Everything always ends up the way you want it to if you have confidence in yourself.
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female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (21 April 2005):
 I think the fact that you still have good conversations and occasional cuddles is a very good sign that she likes you. Girls who don't like you wouldn't be very inclined to do those things. Why would they? So you can count on the fact that she does like you.She probably has no idea how strongly you feel about her (and, frankly, I'm a little worried about your wanting "to die" when you leave her at school) and it might not be a good idea to go from being friends with her to opening your entire heart and telling her the depth of your feelings. It might scare her.So start small. Ask her if she'd like to sit with you at lunch. See if she's be interested in studying together. Engage her in conversations about people you both know. Ask her what her plans are for the weekend. Talk about music. Ask her about her pets. Tell her about the silly photos that someone emailed to you. Recommend movies that you liked. Tell her what it's like to perform on the stage, or play the bagpipes, or skydive, or some other activity you've done.The main thing is, if you ask questions and listen to her answers, she'll think you're a wonderful friend and she'll want to spend more time with you. As time goes on, you can let her know how you feel, by touching her hand when you talk, or giving her a small gift on her birthday, or whatever. The more time you spend around her, the clearer her feelings about you will be. Don't worry, it won't take very long before you have your answer.Be a little brave, and just remember that she's as new at this as you are. You'll do great.
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