A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:hiya well im 17 and my bf is 27 we have been together for 3 years and i love him dearly i want to spend the rest of my life with him and he says that he wants the same. well the problem is about 1 and 1/2 years ago while we was split up i had a one night stand but couldnt go throught with it at all. me and my bf where apart for over 3 months . well just recently he has told me he doesnt want sex with me as he cant get that out of his head but we broke up not so long ago and the day after we broke up he walked past my house with his ex girlfriend hand in hand. in my eyes what he did was worse that what i did but he just cant let it go i forgave him for what he did but now he refuses to give me sex and its chipping away at my confidence because all i can think is he doesnt find me attractive any more please help me this is breaking my heart thanks x
View related questions:
broke up, confidence, ex girlfriend, his ex, one night stand, split up Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhiya thanks for your answers helped me alot gonna talk to him in morning
thanks x
A
male
reader, Swanson  +, writes (30 June 2008):
This story would make way more sense if you were 27 and he was 17. I mean, you were broken up AND you didn't go through with it. Had you closed the deal, I could understand what Yos is saying, but you didn't. To say that you did nothing wrong is an understatement - considering you're at the age where most people fundamentally start expermenting with sex anyway.
honestly I think that it's in your best interest to find a guy closer to your age. In this case, you also might find out that he's more mature than your boyfriend!
...............................
A
female
reader, O Connor  +, writes (30 June 2008):
 You both made a mistake and you were the bigger person to forgive. he needs to make up his mind as to whether a one night stand is worth losing the woman he loves - if he cant grow and make an effort to get over this, then you need to consider leaving him. you need to talk to him and explain this to him. its not fair for him to be forgiven for wat he did and to keep putting you down for wat you did. if he cant get over it and move on with you in his life, then you need to leave him.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2008): Obviously walking past your house with his ex was on purpose. But don't get into a "what they did is worse than what I did" battle. That kind of thinking will only frustrate further. Either this guy is really insecure or he wanted out of the relationship & is using an excuse to end it. Judging from what you've said I'd say he's insecure. So I'd say your better off without him
...............................
A
male
reader, Yos  +, writes (30 June 2008):
 He needs to commit to getting over this.
He needs to admit that it is his problem, and that it is wrong for him to be blaming you for his bad feelings.
If he's not willing to at least try to do that, then you shouldn't stay with him as it will continue to damage your confidence more and more.
You can't necessarily blame him for his feelings (its not surprising he doesn't like you having a one night stand), but you can and must blame him for not trying to get over them and put the past behind you both.
...............................
A
female
reader, astra  +, writes (30 June 2008):
To be quite frank this man sounds bad news. If he is heartless enough to walk past your house with his new girlfriend is very hurtful and didnt consider your feelings.
At your age its very easy to find someone else and think you should
Mary
...............................
|
