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He won't come and say goodbye to me ....

Tagged as: Dating, Health, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (7 January 2012) 5 Answers - (Newest, 7 January 2012)
A female United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

Dear Cupid

I am leaving in 2 days out of state for few months for my work. It would be difficult for my bf to visit me once i leave, its very expensive. So i asked him to come and visit me once before i leave, i cannot visit him right now cause i have a lot to pack and do stuff at work before i leave.

He is saying he is sick (he has cold and took medicines also) and he cannot visit me. He doesnt have to drive also, he can take a train.

I would really like to meet him once before i leave. Is that too much to ask from a bf of 2 years or am i blowing this out of proposition. Please help me, i dont know how to make him realise its imp to me that we meet.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2012):

It is important that you MEET before YOU LEAVE..

Maybe it is important to him that YOU visit him before YOU leave him. Maybe he is not all that into goodbyes, or maybe he is secretly hurt that you could leave him...who knows we are all different...maybe he is unwell as he says, so should you not be more considerate and put him BEFORE work and packing? at least for this one time...the world does not revolve around you and your feelings only...you have/had a boyfriend....send a post card.

spunky monkey.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (7 January 2012):

Honeypie agony auntI agree with CindyCares, if he is sick, why don't YOU take the train and see him? Ask some friends to help you pack whetever needs packing and go see him.

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy +, writes (7 January 2012):

CindyCares agony aunt If Mohammed will not go to the mountain, then the mountain must come to Mohammed.

That train travels in both directions- board it and go see your bf.

He is sick, he's not fit to travel . If meeting him is so important to you- then YOU make time for him. Speed up your preparations, skip the inessential, ask extra time off at work, skip a meal or a night's sleeep, etc. You know what you got to do to make it happen, other than make a sick guy feel worse.

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A female reader, chigirl Norway +, writes (7 January 2012):

chigirl agony auntHe is sick. He can't come. This isn't a matter of him disappointing you or him not wanting to come. This is a matter of facts. If he could have visited you he would have, but he is sick. Too bad, but that's how it is.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2012):

Your not blowing it out of proportion no, you obviously want to say goodbye before you leave,he is your boyfriend after all.

Seems he has issues though, what does he think about you going away for work? Does he understand its your job and its important, required that you go?

I know you have to pack, tie up loose ends at work...but if it IS important that you say goodbye, why not make the effort to go and see him - show him he is special to you. Or meet each other at a halfway point.

If he doesn't want to see you at all before you go,even if you go to him, then I would have a long hard think while your working away because he may not be the right man for you.

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