A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I'd really appreciate some sex tips from anyone that can give them.I've recently started dating a guy who I like A LOT. He's attractive, really sweet, and treats me great. I'd really like to see this relationship last a long time. But I'm a little worried about our sex life. You see, his last relationship lasted for over 4 years. I, on the other hand, have had many short lived relationships (the longest being about a year) and one time sexual encounters. The fact that he's coming from such a long term relationship is very intimidating to me. One night when we were talking, the topic turned to sex, and we shared some of our experiences. Since I've had many sexual partners and he's only ever had one other, I thought smugly that I'd be more "experienced." But Turns out he and his former girlfriend experimented sexually WAY more than I ever have. Almost everything I named he said they had tried. Sex in every orifice, sex in all kinds of public and unusual places, gender reversal, role play, using food... you name it. Now it's made me feel incredibly boring. We've only ever had sex in bed, with the most exotic position being doggy style. He's never in any way made me feel inadequate, but I can't stop thinking about how blase our sex life must seem to him.I'd really like to do something to wow him, something that would be new to him. If anyone has any ideas or suggestions, it'd be much appreciated.
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male
reader, Yos  +, writes (29 July 2008):
 Give it some time. I'm certain the things you're describing didn't happen all at once at the start of his relationship: as intimacy and trust builds over time, you can explore.
I have to say, it does seem like you're seeing sex a bit like athletics. It's really not about how many, or what positions, or what hole. And it's not about 'wow-ing' someone.
Your fears are quite natural. He was in a long term relationship, so you're worried you don't measure up to his former girlfriend. Especially since you're not used to your relationships lasting. Try talking about these fears with him, you might find it even improves your sex life.
A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (29 July 2008):
 It sounds like your man has had his share of experience!! I know how you feel. My 3 year honey has been with 22 other people, and has had quite the laundry list of sexual adventures. However, he was my first ever. So, as you can imagine, I know how you feel.
The bottom line is, you don't need to give him something completely NEW. It sounds like you just need something different between the two of you. The best prop I can suggest? A silk scarf (get 'em cheap anywhere... Forever 21 has cheap scarves if you need a location). Blindfold him, tie him up, tickle him, tease him, use it as a reign, or a leash (whoa! kinky!). To him it will completely new with YOU. Trust me, he's not comparing you to his ex sexcapades... he's just excited to be with you, period.
Get a copy of the Kama Sutra (I really like the COSMO Sutra, put out by Cosmopolitan magazine. You can find it at any bookstore) and ask him which positions he's never tried. Then, give him a wild, wild couple of nights.
Make it fun, make it an adventure. Challenge yourselves to do completely new sexual things with each other. Ask him straight up, "hey - what crazy sex thing have you never done before!!", and if his answer isn't too horrific, give it a try!!
Just remember that you are spicing up your sex life for YOU and YOUR relationship. Not just to beat that ex girlfriend at her own kinky little game.
Enjoy, sweetness!
xx India
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A
female
reader, Karra +, writes (29 July 2008):
Personally I don't think that he would be with u if he thought ure sex was boring. But if u wanna spice it up a little try some new positions. I perfer sometimes the one where I'm in a head stand and he squates down into me. I also know that a lot of times guys like it when u do little things. Like give him head and use the word pussy a lot get dirty with it don't be afraid to tell him to give it to u harder or say pussy a lot it turns guys on. Another thing make sure he isn't doing all the work like if he eats ure pussy make sure u give him some head. Or when ure done having sex let him cum on ure face or chest. THat really turns guys on. Also when doing it doggy style try to press back on his dick guys really like that. As for tips I can't give up all my secrets, but theres a few that should help u spice it up a bit oh yah and let him spank u and pull ure hair it makes them feel more in control. Good luck!
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