A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i've been in tutoring for chemistry.And ive known the guy thats tutoring me for a little ovver a year.we have been flirting with each other alot!and i really like him.and we are secretly seeing each other.the reason we feel that we have to be secret is prior to tutoring me he was in a relationship with my friend.and i met him when i was dating his friend.another thing is that i don't want him to stop tutoring me if things go wrong.and i wont have the greatest tutor ever and i don't want either of our friends to hate us.but i don't want to be secret anymore.what should i do?
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male
reader, Jmtmj  +, writes (26 September 2010):
 Well you're already secretly going out with him, so things not working out and him not tutoring you anymore is already a possibility for one.
As for your friend... well I don't recommend keeping it a secret from her, that's much worse than if you said to her "look, I know its your ex but I'm really keen on him, I want you to be ok with it" etc. At least by showing that you care about what she has to say (even if she isn't ok with it and you go out with him anyways, you've given your friendship with her the best chance of surviving). But if she found out you'd been hiding this from her... odds are, game over.
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