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female
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*lueheart
writes: at the end of last term while in a very drunken state i kissed someone who was a bit older than me. he wanted to go further but i put my foot down and although respected that i know he still thinks theres a chance to go further. the problem is that i dont wanna lose him as a friend but during the summer break especially i realised that i definitely dont want it to carry on next year. the truth is deep down he must realise that its not going to work. how do i tell him this n stay friends at the same time? is it possible? thanks
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female
reader, Ms. Tanya +, writes (4 September 2006):
 Very possible. Tell him how you feel tell him you don't feel that way about him and you still want to see him as friends, but not intimatly. He may sulk for a bit but he'll realise it's just stupid to try and hold a grudge against a smart young girl like you for not having sex with him and he'll be content as friends. However you need to be carful telling him, make sure you get across that this stops as just friends and it will not go anywhere as a relationship, but be gentle, understand he has feelings for you and that you don't want to hurt him more then you have to. Try imaganing it the other way around, if you liked him how would you preffer him to tell you it won't work?
Everyone mopes about people saying no to them, but it really is just as hard to say no as it is to accept it. Good luck hun, I'm sure he'll come around to just being friends soon.
~Ms. Tanya
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