A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I have a problem. You see there is this guy who i have known for years. We were very close in school. But when I went off to college, we kind of grew apart, We didn't speak as much or see each other. I've always had a thing for him. Recently we started chatting on MSN messenger and he really wants to meet up with me again. But I know its not just to catch up, he wants to get together sexually. Its not that I don't want to because, well, I've always thought about it, its just I don't want our meeting up to be just about that. I'd rather meet up and catch up, then see how it goes, if anything I would like a relationship with him, but I'm not sure that's what he wants, and I don't know how to let him know?!?! Please help!!!
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female
reader, jinxx +, writes (11 November 2008):
Tell him you're not interested in something purely sexual, and that you'd like something more from him. Being up front with him will avoid confusion, and if he doesn't want more, you're free to find someone who does.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 November 2008): Check out what he is looking for. Has he actually spoken about sex a lot or are you assuming? Better to find out now whether he is what you are looking for, that way you can either get together both feeling good about it, or remain friends and not hurt each other.
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A
female
reader, Fiona xxx +, writes (10 November 2008):
I can only say set some ground rules and make your intentions clear. There is no harm in saying "no" or saying that you don't believe in sex on the first or second date. That way you will know his intentions by if he sticks around or not (believe me, I know). I am not saying this to be old-fashioned, but as a fellow young person who knows how many opportunities for sex there are. Just don't complicate things, sex for the fun of it is better with somebody you meet in a club rather than somebody you actually want to go out with.
Good luck!
Fiona. xx
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