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female
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anonymous
writes: I recently broke up w/ my bf of 6 years because he got drunk one night and cheated on me with my friend..When I found out what happened, he told me that he knew he messed up everything, he truly regret it and that he realizes how much I mean to him. He says he wants to prove to me that he can be trusted again and that he loves me one and only. And I'm trying to let go of what happened and try to accept him once again so we can get back together sometime if not now. But it's been more than a month since the incident. I'm still in pain about what happened and living in misery, yet seems like he has moved on with his life, going out and having fun with friends. We still talk and hang out as friends but it hurts to see that he has made me suffer so much pain, but he is not as guilty as he should be.I really don't know how he feels about me because he has been going out alot more with friends and I can't stop thinking that he is out there trying to meet other girls. I asked him how come he is able to enjoy his life when he was the one who messed up. He said because he doesnt want to live in the dark with all the guilt he goes out to have fun and forget about it. He also says that he just want to take a break, be single and enjoy his life right now.I know we are still young (22), but I really want to work things out with him cause I love him so much. When a guy says he wants to take a break in this situation, can I assume that he still wants to get back with me later on or is he just going to go on with his life..?Help please
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 December 2005): I think you wrote the answer in your question. He wants space. I'm sorry it hurts, but it sounds like he doesn't want to be in a relationship anymore. Yeah, you could chase him and try to make him yours again, but he doesn't seem ready for a serious relationship. He messed around on you, and he's enjoying time with his friends more than trying to patch things up with you. I'm sorry for your hurt, but I would try letting go now. It'll hurt worse if you keep your heart opened to him, and continue getting rejected. Cry it out, and close it up sister.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 December 2005): Just do it honey! If it bothers you so much about it, just try getting him out with you again. If it hurts you so much, then stop being in this Catch 22 loop - see him, want him, but in pain, can't stop thinking about the incident, but can't stand him seeing other women, love his touch, his lips, his emotions, but hate the idea of him cheating... and so on... [sigh] Stop running the hamster wheel and jump off!
Don't assume anything! Go for your own desires and try to run the yards to score, else, back away, shave your head, and pray to whatever god you choose, to never tempt you with these desires of the flesh again!
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