A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Someone told me their deepest, darkest secret.As a child, he and his sister were curious and engaged in brief sexual contact.Although he truly feels that he didnt know any better, he still feels like he is the worst person in the world because of his mistake. He feels that no one will ever accept him. I dont judge him for it, and I believe that what he did should stay between him and the Lord.What do I tell him?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2007): First, tell him he is not the worst person in the world for having a sexual experience with his sister. This kind of thing happens a lot between brothers and sisters, just that people don't talk about it. The Internet has brought out just how common sibling incest it. I have read a lot of posts on the Internet from women who said they learned to give handjobs and blowjobs by asking their brothers to show them how to do it, and the girls ended up giving their brothers handjobs and blowjobs quite often. You said they were both curious, so it sounds like his sister agreed to do it, so it's not like he forced her to do it against her will. Tell him you understand, that it is all in the past, and he can move on with your blessing. If it is causing him problems, then he should see a therapist to help him get over the guilt.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2007): I think he was very brave for telling you his biggest secrete and it shows he really truely trusts you, tell him that the past is the past and you cant change it, you can only learn from it, if you learn from a mistake then its never really a mistake its a lesson, and tell him not to let somthing temporary effect him perminently. My bf told me some things that he has never told anyone and its similar to your problem, but i respected him for telling me and we are closer now.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 April 2007): reassure him that everything is or wiil b fine nd his deep dark secret is safe wiv u nd u swear on ur life that u won't tell another soul (unless he tells u 2!)as long as u live.
Hope this helps!x
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A
female
reader, ragdoll +, writes (19 April 2007):
 im sure you give good advice, but i think that a problem that roots from childhood should be dealt with with the help of a proffessional. suggest that he start seeing a psychiatrist.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 April 2007): Lots of younger siblings and cousins do this. Curiosity is not a sin. When I was young, me and my boy cousin did a few things that we were curious about as well as me and my girl cousin. We use to 'pretend' me or her was a guy and did things. Its nothing to be ashamed of, but still not something you want every one to know. For this guy to have told you this, he must be a close friend or trust you you deeply. Keep his trust by letting him know that what he did was only an act of curiosity and that you don't think what he did was wrong. Asides from that, I trust you know to keep it secret for him. Hope this helped.
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