A
female
age
30-35,
*antasytoocute
writes:I've been with my boyfriend for like 9 months. I love him so much but we always fight, I know fighting is normal but not all the time.. he has a really bad temper and he gets mad for everything and he always causes it. I don't know why he does that when I don't do none of those things.. and I told him to change but he said that's the way he is and that he's not going to change.I gave him two choices, either he changed or I'm not going to be with him any more and he says he's not gong to change.. does that mean he doesn't care? That he doesn't love me like he says he does... by saying he won't change and letting me go like that? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 April 2009): Do some research on some disorders. My husband has ADD, which causes him to be impatient sometimes. I'm not saying make excuses for him, but try to figure out why he is being the way he is.
Regardless of whether he has anything or not, he shouldn't be treating you this way.
I hate to say this (cos people say advice like this to me all the time) but stand up for yourself. If you find that doing this just causes a cacophany of yelling back and forth, than maybe just let him go.
You should be the love of his life, not the person he can come home and yell at. He will eventually learn when woman after woman lets him go. He is probably hoping he will one day find a woman who puts up with what he is doing. Don't be that woman.
A
male
reader, blazee  +, writes (13 April 2009):
 It dosn't look like you have a healthy relationship. When your explaining about your problems you said he causes all of them and you dodnt do anything. Well that shows the problem, both of you are failing to see it from the others point of view and are defiant in your arguments. The way you see it is that he causes all the problems, Try to understand each other. If he is being violent, physically or mentally for no reason and you can see it is his fault then it is best to come out of the relationship because you dont deserve to be treated like that; and no what he said dosnt mean he dosnt love you. Nobody can change who they are, he is merely telling you that apart from gradually chaning over time he can never truly be the dream person you want him to me straight away
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