A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So I broke up with my ex boyfriend about 5 weeks ago. We were together for 4 years and he texted me for the first time after 5 weeks of not talking and said "someone made me think of you today. Hope you're doing well, I'm doing great:)" what am I supposed to say to him? I'm trying to get over him and he texts me. Doesn't he know that I'm still coping with our break up. We were long distance btw. Does he want me back? I mean we were together for 4 YEARS. Not talking for 5 weeks is nothing. I got so upset when I read his text. I started tearing up. Can anyone explain this to me? He was my first real serious boyfriend so I don't have much experience in dealing with this. Thanks.
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female
reader, YouWish +, writes (23 June 2013):
 I got the same impression Dorothy Dix did -- why did he need to put that last line of "I'm feeling great :)" in if not to try to get back at you? It read to me like "haha I'm over you" with all the grace of picking your emotional scab.
You also mentioned that YOU broke up with him. He's probably as "great" as the sun is blue and the desert sand quenches thirst.
I also agree that you should let him eat static. If he had to TEXT that to you, he's most certainly NOT "doing great". Not by a long shot.
It's also possible that he was drunk texting you if it was at night and he likes to drink. However, sober people can be just as petty and vindictive. He's fishing to see how you're holding up.
Again, never give him the satisfaction of seeing one tear from you either in person or in text. I'm sorry that hurt you...I think it was meant to either do that or entice you to restore contact with him.
A
female
reader, Dorothy Dix  +, writes (23 June 2013):
Hi there. It is rather unusual, to say the least.
It seems like he did it to gloat.
Because at the end of it, he said - "I'm doing great. (And a smiley face.)"
So why bother?
It seems to serve no purpose.
I say, that you DO NOT answer it at all.
Just as if you had not received it in the first place.
And if he sends you any more text messages, well then ignore them also.
Just delete them, without even reading them.
So then it short circuits it altogether.
He will eventually get tired of receiving no response, and so he will stop sending them.
Problem solved.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2013): breakups are awful and painful there is no question about that. Your ex-boyfriend is probably hurting too. He doesn't mean to make you suffer and I'm sure he knows you are trying to move on. I truly believe he just missed you, that's all, and that's why he sent you a text saying someone made him think about you. You can reply back if you want and say thanks for the message !! A response will not change anything, you might hear from him again or he will never text you again. I know how you feel, you are trying to move on and suddenly out of the blue, he texts you, but think of the positive side and calm down!! All will be well. Don't be mad at him. Good luck
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2013): Do not answer him, he wants to know you miss him to make himself feel better. As hard as it may be for you do not respond. You are young and although it's cliche there are many other fish in the sea.
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A
female
reader, xedep  +, writes (22 June 2013):
 Im so sorry that you had to go through and emotional breakup and that you are still hurting over it- one of the most painful things in life to go through and I hope you are doing ok. As for the text: Dont over-read or over-think what is happening, if I was you Id just reply casually, something along the lines of ''Hey, Im doing fine thanks, whats new? :)'' Something that shows him that you still arent hurting over the breakup but something that isint just blanking the guy OR Over-ally friendly. I dont know why he texted you or why hes trying to get back into contact with you but if you just keep up a cheerful mood and a good attitude maybe you will be able to find out soon. Hope this helps xx
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