A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I met a guy 3yrs ago, and we fell in love. I have serious trust issues with men, purely based on being cheated on in previous relationships and the main reason being because in my family, all the men have cheated, and betrayed the women they were with, including my father. I understand that has had a negative effect especially since I first hand dealt with my father leaving my mother. I let my trust issues affect my relationship with my bf. We had a rough patch, where I was quite ill also, and at the end of it, we made promises to each other, that I would try to trust him 100% and not to make unrealistic accusations at him, and he promised that he would never hurt me. Knowing my history he promised that he would be faithful, that he wouldn't give me a reason to not trust him. I'm quite cynical but he seemed very genuine knowing how upset I was over this. So then comes to now. He broke up with me. He tells me he still loves me, he tells me that he always will, but he still doesn't want to be with me? And I don't understand one bit. He hasn't been with anybody else, I know this for a fact as I was quite close to his family and friends. Still am even after this. I just don't understand? Does he want me at all? What should I do, is it possible to win him back, because I still love him very much?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2011): The best thing to do is to give him his space. If it's meant to be it will happen on it's own time. To me it seems as if he is overwhelmed with everything. The best thing for you to do is focus on yourself and work on learning how to trust. If you are always thinking that the person is going to do something wrong before the relationship starts, it doesn't allow for a good start to a relationship.
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