A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:This probably has nothing to do with sex or relationships, but I need to ask someone.My biological father is an alcoholic. I don't live with him, but I have to go out and see him sometimes. The last time I went to his place he was drinking and he told me it was okay. that night he let me sleep in his bed since he doesn't have that big of an apartment, and he came in later after I had fallen asleep and laid down beside me and asked if I was getting hot. I said yes, because I was, and he took off my clothes. He started to do stuff to me like touching my breasts and my legs. He didn't do anything to me. He was drunk and I don't think he meant it, but now I'm scared to go back over there. What should I do?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 May 2007): I am a lecturer in London and you need to report your father to the police, this is a child abuse, this is completely wrong and you need to act now or you will be left in a very vulnerable position.
Not to mention psychological problms that will come if this continues.
Tell an adult you trust and you must inform the police as this can't be allowed to continue, you say you think he didn't mean to do it, well i tell you something i think he knows exactly what he was doing!
He has probably done this before and will do it to someone else
I would also advise you don't see your father and let the police deal with it.
He clearly has issues and needs professional help, the police will assist him in getting the help he needs such as: AA meetings and therapy for his alcoholism.
You've been brave enough to put this online you can def go to the police don't be scared, you will get a lot of support.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 May 2007): Not only do you need to tell your mother but you need to tell the police. I am a police officer in England and deal with this kind of thing alot. It's probably not the first time your father has done it and i doubt it'll be the last. Please tell the police. He may be your dad but you are the important one here and you can not let this ruin your life. The police take it very seriously. Tell them
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A
female
reader, Cateyes +, writes (12 May 2007):
 First of all, you need to tell your mother. She really needs to know because you do not need to go over their again. More then likely, he WILL do this again and it will lead to further sexual advances. (and I pray this never happens!) He needs to hear it from your mom what happened, because he may and may not remember. He needs to work on himself to become a sober father and realize what he did was ENTIRELY WRONG! Some alcoholics due tend to turn to their own children, porn sites, phone calls for sex, you name it because they feel no one "understands" them because they DO have a problem and do not want to face it or believe they have a problem...it's called denial. Your mom will probably become very upset if not very angry, and she should be, however, PLEASE do not let this be a reason for you not to tell her. What he did was WRONG...VERY WRONG!! And in order for him to ever seek any professional help or treatment, he NEEDS to know the sickening things he has done, especially to you and that others are aware of it what he did. He may and may not seek help, but you DO NOT need to be around him ANYMORE until he seeks help and approved by your mom. I know he is your father, BUT, he needs some real help which you nor your mom can help him. Let your mother handle it...I am sure she is very wise and knows what to do. Something tells me that is why, by the sound of your letter, they are probably divorced or separated. (because of his drinking) And even if not, it doesn't matter...the main thing is you need to speak up and let her know. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE do not keep this to yourself and sweep it under the rug! If it happened to you, do you not think it could happen to some other young girl? And would you like that thought bearing on your shoulders because you never spoke up? My heart will pray you do the right thing....always here if you need to talk.
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A
female
reader, love-him  +, writes (12 May 2007):
 tell someone about it, the fact he undressed you in bed with him is out of order and the fact that he touched your breasts is even worse. dont go over there alone again and if he offers you his bed, say no to it and take the sofa or any other option if not, just go home. hope i helped chick x x x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 May 2007): What he did was bordering on child molestation and he can go to jail.
As a female, you need to stand up for your rights even if he is your father. Do not let your emotions for him allow him to do things to you.
I have had a sister who was touched by my stepfather, and he learned from his problem. We are now a happy family and he has overcome his problem by seeking help.
Do not go back there until you talk to him and tell him you felt uncomfortable with what he did.
Make him understand that it was very wrong.
If he refuses to acknowledge what he did, simply do not visit him untill he seeks help.
Never let the love of a family member stand before your own safety.
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