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female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: i dont know where to start, but i know im very depressed at the moment, i have 4 children 2 are disabled so i have quite alot on my plate, im also doing a full time college course in fitness training, so im juggling quite alot, the childrens dad left about 5yrs ago and dosent see the children i dont have family that i get on with, so im pritty much alown, but i got talking to my freinds brothering law 6 months ago we got in to a relashonship it all went very quick we been living together 5 months now i love him so verry much, his got a daughter witch is not a problem we both exsepted we had children, his daughter lives with the mother but he sees her every other weekend over nite, but when we got together there was a family holiday pland him his mother and his farther brother sisterin law were all going to disiny i didnt mind it was already bookt so i understood but he said i shouldnt meet his daughter until after then just incase his daughters mother gets funny about him having a girlfreind so i said that i understood so when he had his daughter at the weekends he went and stayed with her at his mothers, but the holiday came and went it herts him being here 12 days then on the 13th day going at 9am to get his daughter hearing nothing from him till he,d taken her back the next day then hed retern home to me and my children i tryed to be pashont seeing as the holiday was booked he said it would be diffront after, we,d meeet her we would get to know her and do things together as a family witch i was looking forward to i love children i just wanted us to all be one big happy family and help and be part of making his time with his daughter enjoyable he enjoys the good times i have with my children, but the holiday was over a month ago and his had his daughter 3 times but once agane he got up thismorning and left and his going to his mums to have his daughter and i dought very much il see him till tomoro until he drops her off, i feel like me and my children are good enough to be his family for 12 days but then the two days come that he has his daughter and me and my children are packt away in a box and forgoten about, we have spoken about it he just says she dont want to come here, i dont know what to do im a mess but trying to hold it together for my children, they have become very attached to him and dont understand why he dont bring her round to play with them, i just feel he feels im not good enough for his daughter iv put up with this for months now i have said to him il only give it another 5 weeks if there no improvement there no point going on am i rite do i give up now or give it 5 weeks or am i wasting my time, im not asking him to choose between me and her but i am asking to get in to my life properly or theres no point, im now going to sit here for a weekend exsplaning to my children they carnt see him cos his with his daughter but after tomorow his out family agane, i know this is a rill long message and im not sure il get a reply but i needed to talk im a mess and need to hold it together for my kids i dont want to loose my man i just want to be a proper family, and sone days i just want to die cos i dont feel good enough im fed up with being mr nice i was pashont i tryed to understand but his not thinking of how i feel packt away in my little box agane for the weekend.
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male
reader, Big boy +, writes (13 January 2007):
 No you’re not put inside a box. Is just all in your head, it’s his daughter he can’t force her to do what he wants. I could sort of understand where he is coming from. Like you said you don’t want to lose your man, don’t put any pressure on him, relax all you can do is just be nice to him. He cares for you, from what you say, you spend time with your kids, just relax things will work out, be happy to be alive, don’t chase him away, because any thing you do out side this could result in a break up. Like you said you spoke to him, play it cool see where he is going, it’s your decision to act any way you feel. All I’m saying is that I know it has not been easy for you but things will get better just believe in it. Within time things will change. When he is away enjoy your company with just you and your kids even play with them or do something together.
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