A
female
age
,
*iana11111
writes:just back from hols with my boyfriend. looked at one of his texts he had sent to his ex wife. at the end of the text he ended it with a x. (they have three children together and have been separated for twelve years). i know it was wrong to look at his mob but i have, he doesnt like his private life aired in public, and wouldnt be happy about me looking at his mob. i know he doesnt love her but i feel like i have been kicked in the teeth. should i confront him or not?
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female
reader, diana11111 +, writes (19 November 2007):
diana11111 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for the three replies. the guy who said x's dont mean anything, i dont agree. he always puts loads of x's on my texts especially when he's telling me how much he loves me. if i am angry or annoyed at him he's lucky if he gets 1 x from me. previous texts what she has sent to him (and he has shown me) have x's at the end. this has always seemed odd as me and my ex do not put anything of the sort. x's are a sign of affection. anyway thanks again i will ponder on the subject....
A
female
reader, Love-struck  +, writes (19 November 2007):
 dont be silly, i can understand where you are comming from but i think confronting him would make matters worse how could you explain looking through his texts in a way he would understand?, and i always end my messages in an ''x'' its just my way of signing off, my dad and mom have been separated for a while now and deffinatly dont have feelings for each other but when my mom sends messages she ends them with an ''x'' (like me) even when she sends a text to my dad about what time he should pick us up for visits etc. i think you should let this one go, and if there was anything going on between then im sure you would know about it because he had kids with this woman so getting back together would certainly be in the intrest of the children. i know you will probably feel like monitoring his texts now but it will just make you anxious and worried, try forget about it =)
x
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A
male
reader, TomWilkinson +, writes (19 November 2007):
 There is no way you should confront him with this, a "x" at the end of a text means nothing in the slightest, least of all to men. I personally, put an "x" on all texts to all females, my gf, ex-gf's, mam, sister, aunties, cousins. It's simply "being nice".
And not meaning to argue, but "monitoring" this would be WAY out of line, this is just a polite way of saying "neurotic spying". The odds are overwhelmingly that this means nothing, and for you to watch this, and if he finds out, that you're doing so, then give the reason "well I looked at your messages..." then you will come across very very badly.
Please try not to worry about it, it's only a letter
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2007): It depends. Like if he usually writes messages to his friends ending with an x, then he probably just does it out of habit and so you have nothing to worry about. But if, in general, it is not like him to end his messages with an x, then I would be bothered too. And, in that case, yes you should confront him. (To be honest, I would be bothered either way).
The trouble with guys like that is that if they don't instinctively know where to draw the line out of respect for you, little things like that might keep coming up in your relationship. Cause they just don't know or don't 'understand,' supposedly.
If he is just a real 'friendly' 'lovey' kind of guy with all the people around him then you can expect that this type of stuff will keep coming up.
I personally have been with guys like that and I don't like it. I like a guy who saves all his x's and all his sweetness for me and who understands it is out of respect and so knows where to draw the line.
But of course you should bring it up, but, if it is his personality it might just come up again in the future. I guess you can take it or leave it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2007): I wouldn't confront it at all - not yet - because he will go underground if anything is going on...but I think you should monitor things because unless he is the kind of person that puts kisses at the end of everything then he is making an intimate statement. It is possibly flirty. How are things in your relationship? Have things changed? He could just be being kind of 'family-polite' kind of kiss. However if his ex is still single she may get some kind of idea he is trying to get back with her and creating false hope. If she has a partner I wonder if he would feel a bit odd perhaps seeing a text with a kiss at the end of it from her ex. I would monitor things carefully but don't let on you saw it.
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