A
female
age
,
*TAC
writes:I'm dating a 60 year old man who's never been married, never engaged, never lived with anyone, longest relationhsip was 4 years. He's got a lot going for him; very attractive, fit, well educated, great job/security, good sense or humor, articulate. After three months dating he wanted to know my philosophy of women paying 50%. What are the chances he's loyal, comitted?
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female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (18 February 2010):
 Just curious, how old are you?
A
female
reader, Tigerlily +, writes (18 February 2010):
Sounds like he's got commitment issues to me, and his asking for 50/50 is just a way to keep you at a distance. His way of saying, look honey, I'm not going to take care of you here, so don't get too attached. You pay your way I'll pay mine. Red flag for me if you are looking for commitment.
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A
female
reader, Angzw  +, writes (18 February 2010):
He sounds like a stingy bugger. Won't share his life, his love and definitely won't share his money. A decent gentleman would wait for you to offer not ask you if you can pay your half. What if you just don't have as much as he does? A couple of years ago I dated a man who fits this description to a Tee. He was very wealthy (major shareholder in an insurance company) but wouldn't even call me because he said its too expensive and he preferred me to call. Wouldn't fly to me and preferred me to fly to him at my expense ofcourse. Expected me to pay for dinner. I'm sorry but old-fashioned men are far much better; because as the woman in the relationship you always end up doing more whether you like it or not, especially if you have an older boyfriend. For instance, if he decided he wanted you to have his baby, what is your uterus, your body, your stretched vagina worth? Surrogates charge $100k, would he pay his half? Will he really do as much vacuuming and dusting and laundry and cooking as you have done in previous relationships? Maybe date him and see but in my experience there is no good future with a stingy man. My stingy ex man invited me to a holiday for my birthday then asked me how we are going to split this...! I don't care if I'm labelled a gold digger but I'm not paying for my own birthday treat, thank you very much.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2010): i am 45 and do everything 50/50 with my husband but we are both independent creatures and high earners. It is not appropriate if you are younger or are not earning the same amount of money. Good will, if you help clean. cook etc should all be taken into consideration. It works well for us as both are very mercenary but it is not a particularly loving way to be.
I also think at 60 with no previous wives, no kids and not lived with someone that there is definitely something not quite right with him. Go out with him for a bit longer before you commit to anything.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (18 February 2010):
 A man who has not married at that age must have skeletons in his closet.
He believes that marriage is like a business concern where each partner share 50/50.
If both are fiancially of the same standards, it would not be a problem but if one is not as wealthy as the other, how could you maintain the 50/50 ratio?
In order for this to work , both must have the same financial strength.
A union that is not based on love but on financial considerations will not last.
He will be loyal and committed only if the other partner maintains her share . Otherwise , he will withdraw from the partnership.
What is your philosophy of women paying 50% ?
Theoretically , it is a good way but it is simply impossible to calculate everything in $$$ and cents.
How do you calculate household chores and all those work in and outside the home ?
What about those intangibles and good-wills ? Nobody can put a price on that.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (18 February 2010):
I would suggest that this is a man who values his independence. I think he would commit, but only if you were to do everything 50/50. So you also need to be independent.
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