He says they didn't do anything, then why did she call it a one night stand?

Tagged as: Breaking up, Cheating, Dating, Friends, Three is a crowd, Troubled relationships

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Question - (21 March 2006)

5 Answers - (Newest, 22 March 2006)

A female , anonymous writes:

Me and My boyfriend have had a rocky relationship for a while. Despite this we've always made up, when I am with him, in his arms I am so at peace and happy. We have real passion between us, and affection and have quite a deep understanding of each other. Despite all this we manage to argue, our arguments have been getting worse, to the point where we are just making each other miserable and relying on each other too much to be perfect. Our arguments recently have been ending with that saying " I'm not coming back this time" , and we don't speak for a while, we are both as stubborn as each other

Recently we were trying to reconcile after the latest bust up, I gave in and phoned him. We spent the weekend together and he was acting dodgy, an old female friend had been in contact in my absence, and I have always felt threatened by her. I was also uncomfortable with the fact that he took her to his massage calss on Thursday, and told my boyfriend how I felt. I didn't see my boyfriend on the Friday night, but he came round mine on Saturday morning, saying he loved me and wanted to make it work, had so much stress at the moment and I wasn't making it easier.......She kept calling him that day and he was hiding the calls from me, I told him to invite her round (I thought I have to get over my jealousy) and he refused saying that me and her don't get on. She was even calling his house phone at three / four in the morning.

Cut a long story short, In the morining I was suspicious I looked on my mans phone and there photos of her on taken on Saturday morning (just before he came round my house) and a text demanding to know why he used her as a one night stand. Well I'd seen enough and felt like a complete fool. I asked him what it was all about and he confessed that she had stayed at his the night before, but it was innocent, nothing happened. The reason he didn't tell me was cause I'd go mad, well I didn't beleive him, I took my stuff and went.

I'll get to the point I have been in turmoil and felt disgusted for the last two weeks. I went out last weekend (I live in a rough area) and ended up getting beaten up my some rough girls. It was not a nice experience and when 'my bloke' heard about it he contacted me, we spoke for 2.5 hours. He explained his friend had been drunk that night and come around crying and just passed out. He called her family to pick her up but they said leave her there. He took photos of her because she took photos of him. He insists he did not do anything with her, she was also drunk when she sent the messages, and doesn't remember doing it and doesn't know why she sent the message. He said he's stopped talking to her because of the trouble she's caused. Again I spent the weekend just gone with 'my bloke' and it was a really passionate one. I still don't know if I beleive him, as much I want to I'm fed up of being heartbroken, In the last two weeks my heart has been broken and I have felt humiliated and he let me feel like that for two weeks without bothering to explain himself. I don't feel as though he appreciates it, and I just don't just don't know where to go from here............... I just don't know how I feel now!

I feel guilty if I don't speak to him cause I slept with him, I like being with him as he made me feel safe again, I want to forgive him, but

View related questions: drunk, heartbroken, jealous, one night stand, text

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A female reader, shania +, writes (22 March 2006):

Ok,if you dont want to send the letter then thats just fine,the fact that he cannot be trusted is enough for you to walk away.Personally....if you see him again,you just make it clear that it is over between you and him and that you have moved on....you then hold your head up high,smile and walk away,if you send the letter you might feel that you have had the last word but it will probably go on and on with his excuses etc....it will just drag on,you need a clean break.Good luck.