A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I really need some advice. Have been seeing this guy casually for about 5 months. We always met up once a week to hang out and sleep together as we were friends with benefits and we both did not want a relationship. He used to text me around 3 times a week to ask how I was etc which was nice. But for past couple of months, it seemed that it was me always texting him first and initiating meeting up as I would never hear from him. The frequency of us meeting had changed to once every two weeks instead of the usual once a week. I got a bit annoyed and asked him outright if he was still interesting in seeing me. He replied ''yes but just not so often''. Is he saying this cos he stopped enjoying my company?Anyway, we were supposed to meet the other day but as I had a lot on my mind, I completely forgot he was coming round to mine. I was out having dinner with a friend when he rang to say he was outside my house!! I was like ''oh my god I forgot so sorry''. He was just blunt and hung up. He was annoyed which was completely understandable. So he came into the restaurant, where I was having dinner, as he works there and we just didnt speak. I just blanked him.I then felt bad and messaged him afterwards telling him I had a lot on my mind which was why I forgot. He responded and he seemed fine about it. So when I asked him if were still on for next week, he replied ''I would prefer to give it a miss''. So following day, I texted him asking '' do you not want to me see me again then?'' he replied '' I may regret it but just feel it's time to move on''This why I am so confused and angry. Why would he say this and what does he mean by ''I may regret it''? and move on from what? we weren't in a relationship so why say to move on?? I would appreciate if someone could please give me there opinion on this whole situation. He still says the sex is amazing, so why would he not want to see me again?
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friend with benefits, move on, text Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 August 2009): I think you have played a dishonest game with yourself.If you do not want a realtionship with this man or any man and were in it for the sex only then that means that it will come to an end at some point when one or both of you gets tired of the sex, the newness has warn off and the excitent as that is all it was about to begin with.Why are you mad that it is over? If all you want is benefits, you can find that in any bar any time you decide to have a one night stand....or what ever.He didn't offer you a realtionship, he doesn't owe you a relationship, he doesn't owe you sex....he has moved on, what after all did you expect when you starte
A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 August 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionso you mean he doesn't wanna see me anymore because I forgot he was coming over that evening? Cos it was after that he said we need to move on...
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2009): Although he says the sex is amazing he wants to go and see if there is better than you out there and if not thats the part he will regret,as you say you was not in a relationship so dont waste your enegy being angry just remember it is his loss
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A
female
reader, Lovebug9  +, writes (5 August 2009):
ok i understand both sides and what hd meant by he mite regret it was tht he mite regret leave u n the past and he mite regret giveing up on the sex.....and what he meant by move on i think what he meant was tht he got tired of sleeping around if nothing was happening between u to that is my opion to what is going on cause the same sorta thing happened to me
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A
female
reader, bitch +, writes (5 August 2009):
I think he just doesn't want to hurt your feelings and by saying "I may regret this" it would be more acceptable to you in terms of not getting your feelings so hurt. He doesn't want to see you anymore. If he did, he would definitely say so. He would be calling you and telling you he needs you etc... He is not doing this and basically he has said he is done. I think it is time to move on and you should not sleep with anybody for "benefits" because it can lead to hurt feelings for yourself in the end. Don't give yourself to just anybody. Give yourself to somebody who you really want to love and who deserves your love.
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