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female
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anonymous
writes: I really need some advice. I don't know what to think anymore. My boyfriend and I have been dating for seven months. He is 25 and I am 21. In the past my boyfriend has slept with a lot of woman. Probably almost up to 100... We have a very open relationship and we talk about everything. I recently just moved in with him and we are great together. We love each other so much and want to spend our lives together. We are not only boyfriend/girlfriend, we are best friends as well. Although, we have one problem. ...and that problem is he craves having sex with other woman. He admits that it's hard to think he will have sex with only one woman for the rest of his life. Which I understand, because of his past, it makes sense.... When he told me this, it did hurt a lot, but I tried to understand because he was just being honest.Although now, this subject keeps being brought up. He craves crazy sex and he can't help it. He said he loves woman, he loves looking at them. When we go out partying and drinking together he pays attention to all of them and almost flirts with them. I am a very easy going person and I could care less if he socializes and talks to woman, but it seems like its going a little too far.He says he would never cheat on me. I am a very sexual person as well and in the future we have decided to have a three some, which would be good for me and him and maybe he will get over his sexual urges. I feel so stupid saying that, but I'm just being realistic.So my question is, what do I do? Should I be ok with this? He says it's normal that men have this craving they just hide it from their girlfriends/spouses, but when their with their guy friends they act different(which I agree.) He doesn't want to be like that with me, he wants to be open... but I don't know if most men are this extreme when it comes to sex with other woman if they have a girlfriend they love. It's hard for me when he goes out to trust him... ...because I know exactly what he will be doing... Flirting and talking with females. It's a tricky situation, because I know he loves me, I know he won't cheat on me, but I know that he craves what he can't have. I don't want to be the ball and chain that holds him down, why can't he be ok with just sleeping with me? How can I make him be ok with just sleeping me?Any advice? Anyone?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2005): Firstly if he's slept with that many women has he been tested for any s.t.i's.Im sorry but if someone told me he wants crazy sex with other women then that would send alarm bells ringing!ok you said he wouldnt cheat but eyeing up girls&flirting in front of you aint good,what happens when you want children&your pregnant?is he going to wait until your sex drive comes back.maybe its me but i think he will cheat.
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