A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:ok i really really like my friends personality, hes just like me, we have so many things in common and get on so well, we can talk for hours. thing is hes told me he likes me more then a friend and im confused as i honestly dont find he physically attractive. im confused, should i go for it or not? im dont want to mess him about Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Astrid  +, writes (8 April 2007):
 I agree with soulsister if you do not like him so much you should not force it or you maybe will closind the door to a real love realtionship so be friends and that's cool enoughlove
A
male
reader, Abacadaba +, writes (8 April 2007):
 never build a relationship on looks, all that does is help how you look to other people, where what really matters is how you feel, if he has a nice personality and you get on well, then that helps how you feel, your lucky to find somebody you get on with that you can talk to for hours, dont let it get away! At the end of the day, whats more important...1) you look good to your mates cos you have a fit boyfriend..or 2) you know yourself you have a guy you can talk to easily, and have a good time as a couple. Ive seen SO many people make this mistake and get hurt, seriously, think whats more important, how you feel or how other people do.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 April 2007): Definately tough. I think you should go for him, looks arent everything.
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A
female
reader, xxxsoulsistaxxx +, writes (8 April 2007):
 We have all been in this position, wondering whether we're letting a great guy pass us by because we're being shallow and vain. But the fact is, it's not shallow, if you're not attracted to someone, you can't force it. I believe you need that spark when you meet and if it's not there, no matter how well you get on, just be friends.
If you're doing it because of what other people will think of him, that's another story. That is shallow. However, there is nothing wrong with a girl and a guy being mates: men seem to have a problem with this sometimes and end up fancying the girl but we can quite easily do it. We just don't think about sex the way men do.
I think you should talk to him. You obviously care for him but if there's nothing more there for you, don't ruin a good friendship. There's nothing stopping you still having that bond and you may find you work better as friends than lovers.
Once we meet a guy and get to know them, it's like we're conditioned to believe if they treat us well, we should go out with them. It's not like that, girls and boys can be really good friends, in fact most of my close friends are guys. I feel sorry for girls who end up doing sexual stuff with every lad mate they have because they mistake friendship for something more, just because he is the opposite sex. You never get back that friendship once something else has happened.
Good luck and keep him in the know.
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