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female
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anonymous
writes: He says "he doesn’t" like sex! I asked why and he says he gets no feeling, Im 21 and he's 22. He insists on using a condom every time (he’s a big guy and the condom's are fun and games just to get on) even though I take the pill, I wonder if its the fact that the condoms are too thick and not letting thro the sensation? or it's something else, I mean he work part time and is doing a degree and doesn’t have much time to c me, which I don’t mind but it seems to bother him -Stress? - He is also totally frightened of getting a girl pregnant says he would be thrown out and have to hang him self in the garage or somet( i think he's overreacting there, but its the reason he insists on condoms) anyway i dont know what to do i know i cant make him do something he dosnt want to, but i would like him to have sex with me without the condom to c if thats the problem u know, he still has sex with me but i know it more for my benefit that for his.What can i do? Plz Help
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2006): Everything is fine now he enjoys sex as much as i do, im not quite sure if its the face i found some thinner lager condoms or he somehow sorted his possible mental fear of me getting pregnant in the mean time but its all sorted now :D
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2006): Thanks for replying people. Just an update ^^I have given him Oral and he really seemed to enjoy that, which im really happy about and so one step at a time and we will c how things go :)
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2006): I agree with the above also try giving him oral at the same time give your self oral yah know maybe that will help the condum thing is a good thing but, if your on the pill and he pulls out you should be fine also tell him there is a certain time you are ovulating so you guys could time it so you'll be extra safe you can't get any safer than that.
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reader, Rebecca Batchelor +, writes (3 January 2006):
 He obviously has a big hang up about the idea of getting you pregnant. It seems to totally terrify him which would explain why he gets no feeling from sex - its psychological more than a physical problem.
Condoms can also decrease feeling for a man.
Why don't you try masturbating him? You want him to feel pleasure, then make it your mission for him to experience just that. Stroke his body all over and arouse him by masturbating him and giving him oral sex. This will be a treat for him then and you could tell him that he need not worry about having intercourse with you as that isn't the plan; you just want him to experience pleasure.
I think he may need a little help in overcoming his rather phobic reaction of getting a girl pregnant in order to really enjoy sex and perhaps you could also investigate toegther other means of contraception. Condoms, however, are the best way of protecting you not only from pregnancy but sexually transmitted diseases too. If you both know that you are clear from any STD's, then certainly thinking about other contraception could be beneficial for you.
I think one of the first things you need to do is to release the pressure a bit for him and teach him just how enjoyable sex can be. Things may well sort themselves out naturally from there.
I hope this helps.
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