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female
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anonymous
writes: i was living with my partner i have had for 7years and where very happy he allways every day told me he loved me in every part was fine we where going to plan a baby and talked alot about thefurture, until one day he walked in and said he's not in love with me anymore.i asked why was there someone else he said no he told me it wasnt me that i was lovely and the relationship was at the right bit we where happy and had trust ans planning for both of use ,he just says he falling out of love.After about 1 week he kept coming up to see me and calling as i love him i started to do the samenow its been 5week and i have gone to cornwall to break away from trying to contract him,i miss him but he has called only in to the 2nd day asking how i'm before i went he cuddled and kissed me and said i will really miss you .why is doing this if he doesntwant to be withme is there a chance that we could be together.i want it to work help Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 June 2006): I have been in the exact same situation as you my friend. I have been with my partner for 7 years and in Feb last year he walked in and told me that he was moving out and that he had fallen out of love with me. I too asked if there was someone else and there wasn't. I begged him to stay and lost 5kgs in a week (very much not needed) and became needy and tried everything to get him back. After a week I gave up and my friend came around and TOLD me to get in the car, she took me out and we danced the night away. My boyfriend hated this and kept calling me, I told him that he HAD made his decision and what I was doing was none of his concern anymore becuse he dumped me (it was really hard to do) but after a week, he begged me to come back to him, I said NO (I really wanted to say yes) but I remained strong and then he became needy and begged me. Now we are together again. I believe that men go through this mid life crisis thing, but it can be fixed, just give him space and show that you DONT need him.
A
female
reader, kellyO  +, writes (15 June 2006):
 Hi dearie, i must say seven yrs is indeed a very long time and i know u must have invested a lot of time and emotions into this relationship. i know that u must love and care a great deal for him and i really do understand your situation.
If i was in your shoes though i would give him alot of space as you are doing right now to figure out what he indeed feels for me. You werent the one that called off the relationship so it isnt really your obligation to fix it. if he does want u and he really does misses u then he will have to show u. whenever he calls or tries to see u tell him how u feel about him and allow him to make the next move.dont try to read signals into his actions he has been with you now for several years and if he still feels love then he should be able to spell it out.
I know this isnt perhaps what u wanted to hear but believe me it is for the best. absence as they say makes the heart grows fonder and if he does still have any feeling for you believe me he will express it in due time. This is my personal advise though. But the meantime go out and have fun. dont restrain yourself if he doesnt come back it is his lost anyways.
Take care now. Kelly
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